"That isn't necessarily a bad thing, Aleksei," she said, her voice shy.
He loved the sound of her voice when she talked to him in that tone.
"I like you a little scary. It's exciting."
"Do you know what is truly exciting?" he asked.
Her eyes darkened. Smoldered. Sexy as sin.
"The thought of seeing the clothes meant to seduce a man."
13
Aleksei stayed very still, willing Gabrielle to comply. He wanted her to make a move, to show him she wanted him as much as he wanted her. He was beginning to need her. Not the allegiance of a lifemate, but the vow, the promise of a true lifemate. He wanted her to want him. To see him. He had to admit, he hadn't given her much. He intended to change that.
"Sometimes it takes me a couple of times to get the clothes right and inevitably I forget something," Gabrielle admitted.
He liked that she told him that. It was a small thing, but still, it was something she was giving him, a piece of herself.
"And the shapeshifting? Do you make mistakes with that?" That would be worrisome. If Gabrielle's clothes weren't perfect, that would still be perfectly fine, but shapeshifting was dangerous if one didn't know what they were doing. He didn't like that she was so reluctant to discuss that with him.
She took a breath. "I shifted for the first time the night I came here to confront Gary." She bit her lip. "Um. Him," she corrected.
"Kislany." He called her baby gently in his language. "You can say his name to me. It is not just you who needs to come to terms with this. I do as well. And I am." Slowly. Very slowly. He wanted to rip the man's heart out, but she didn't need to hear that. "Tell me about shifting. If you were converted some time ago, why did your sister wait so long to teach you anything?"
"It was my fault," Gabrielle said hastily. "Joie is very busy. She's gone a lot. I was busy doing a lot of research."
He touched her mind. He couldn't stop himself. Gabrielle was clearly choosing her words carefully because she didn't want him to think less of her sister. He inhaled sharply.
"Where did you get the idea that you were less than your sister? Or your brother?" It came out before he could censor. Before he wanted to censor. Her mind was more than just confused. She really believed that ridiculous notion.
He saw the instant retreat. Felt it. He reached out and caught her face, turning it back toward him. "You are not less than anyone. She was not doing work that was needed more than what you were doing."
"As soon as I asked her, she showed me," Gabrielle said in a small voice, a whisper of sound.
His heart turned over. Her mother had done this to her. Made her feel small and powerless. She didn't have the personality to deal with the temper tantrums. And she'd been too young. Too sensitive. Too intelligent. She'd buried herself in the acquisition of knowledge and no one noticed she'd retreated--gone into her own mind and lived there. She was too young for the crowd around her in school, and again, she simply disappeared into studies and into her own mind.
He realized that had become a pattern with Gabrielle. When she'd been traumatized, stabbed repeatedly by the assassins who hunted Carpathians on the pretense that they were vampires, she had retreated into her own mind. No one had noticed. Not even her sister. Not the prince who was responsible for her. No one had taken care of her. They hadn't taught her the very fundamentals of being a Carpathian. To feed. To sleep in the soil where she would be rejuvenated and protected. Safeguards. Shapeshifting. They had given her nothing. It was no wonder she thought herself less than others. To them, it seemed she had no value.
Gary had noticed her. He had realized she needed friendship. Help. Someone to talk to, to share her work and laugh with her. To pay attention. It was no wonder she thought herself in love with the man. He was the only one who really showed her any interest or kindness.
Aleksei shifted out of the chair, opened her thighs and wedged himself between them, kneeling on the floor there between her legs. He framed her face with his hands. "Without you, Gabrielle, I would be either vampire or gone from this world. Without you, the thought of you every single rising, I would have succumbed to the darkness growing in me. I took a vow, for you, that I would never dishonor you. You kept me sane. You did that."
Her breath caught in her lungs. She shook her head. "No, Aleksei, that was you. You're an honorable man. You stood fast against the darkness."
He held her gaze captive. "I made that vow to you, Gabrielle. That vow for my lifemate flows in letters across my back. For you. To you. Whether I found you or not, I knew you. I saw you, there in my mind. In my heart. I knew you would be passionate and sweet. That you would give me whatever I asked for. And that is you. You always give me what I ask for."
"I disobeyed you," she whispered.
"I am not talking about obedience. When I asked you if you would wear your hair down for me when we were alone, you said yes. You gave that to me. Every time I have asked you for something, you have said yes. You give it to me. I had no idea you would be this beautiful, but I knew you. I talked to you. Each rising, before I went hunting, I told you I would be there for you. I would give you everything you wanted or needed. That I would keep you safe. I would protect you. I would love and cherish you. I meant those things. You saved me. You did that, no one else."
She shook her head. "This is why you were so angry. I understand it better now. I betrayed you when you needed me most."
He stilled her face. "No, o jela sielamak, which means 'light of my soul,' because that is what you are to me. The light of my soul when I had none. When I was nothing but darkness."
"Aleksei." She whispered his name. A denial.
"You are the most important person in my world. I know you are afraid of me. I have demons. The darkness resides in me. I control my world. I want my woman to myself. I want her devoted to me. None of those things is easy to live with, and when you combine them, it makes it particularly difficult. It is no easy task to take me on, but always, always, know that you are the most important person in my life."
"You scare me most of the time, Aleksei," she admitted.
He smoothed his hand over her dark hair. "I know I do, kislany, but fearing me makes you come alive."
She took a breath and let it out, nodding. Giving him that. She was reluctant and embarrassed to admit it, but still, she gave the admission to him.
"I cannot stop being who I am, Gabrielle. I will always be controlling. I will do my best to try to remember you are modern, but I have centuries of being a predator with no one challenging me. When you challenge me, it makes me crazy. It makes me need to dominate you. To show you who you belong to. I need you to give in to me."
She gave him a faint smile, her fingers trailing along his jaw. "It's kind of nice to have someone else making decisions, especially when I question every decision I'm making. I can't be any different, though, either, Aleksei, and I'm not all about obeying."
He laughed softly. "Then we will have to make certain both of us enjoy your disobedience."
"Is that possible?"
"Oh, yes, my innocent, it is very possible. You will learn that lesson this night. We have many lessons to enjoy together. We can practice shapeshifting so I will know you are safe, and then we will continue until you feel as if you
were born Carpathian and are powerful in your own right. Does that sound like a plan?"
She nodded.
For the first time she relaxed completely, and she looked happy.
He ran his hand down her front, from her throat to her lap. Light. Possessive. Claiming her. "You can start by showing me these clothes of seduction."
"I don't think you need clothes of seduction to be seduced," she said, her long lashes veiling the sudden sultry expression in her eyes. "I think you get all revved up without them."
His eyebrows shot up. She was teasing him. He'd never been teased--or if he had, he didn't remember. It tasted wonderful on his tongue. Her smile. The sound of her voice. The teasing tasted like Gabrielle and filled his mouth with the exquisite flavor he was so addicted to, the one he craved and now needed so urgently.
"What's your favorite color, Aleksei?"
Her voice came out husky. Sensual. A whisper that had blood pounding in his cock.
"Color?" he repeated.
"You must have one color you like more than others."
He didn't understand where the conversation was going but he was willing to go along with it because her beautiful eyes promised him paradise.
"I like fire. Red."
"Of course you do." Gabrielle inhaled sharply, drawing Aleksei's masculine scent deep into her lungs. She should have known he would prefer red.
She kept her gaze burning deep into his, waved her hands slowly down her body, letting her fingertips skim the sides of her breasts, trace her tucked-in waist and the flare of her hips. Her touch continued down her thighs. All the while, she pictured the daring image in her head of the sexiest lingerie she'd seen.
The camisole was a deep red, made of stretch floral lace, revealing and concealing, but definitely showing off her abundant curves. The front had a mock corset detail, so that the ties were crisscrossed but showed an abundance of skin. The garters attached to red fishnet stockings that were topped with floral lace. The small, red thong was more stretchy lace, and she had made certain she was smooth and bare for him.
Aleksei sank back on his heels, his face going hard, lust fueling the fire in his gaze. "Stand up," he whispered, almost hoarsely.