I swallow back the hint of fear that arises every time my mother takes this tone with me. It used to work like a lucky charm when I was a kid but as I got older, it lost its magic. Though it never ceases to take me back to my childhood, being the scared kid who was about to get an ass whooping for coming home with three detention slips from the same class in third grade. This tone used to have my every last confession slipping from between my lips but as I look up and meet her eyes, I realize that I can’t tell her this.
My mother is sweet and innocent, she has a kind heart and is the most generous woman I’ve ever met. I can’t darken her soul by telling her what Jude did to me, I can’t tell her about dad and crush her heart, and I sure as hell can’t tell her what I did to Jude last night. I won’t do that to her. I’d prefer to carry the burden on my own.
I stand up and grab my school bag off the floor. It gets pulled over my shoulder before I step into Mom and wrap my arms around her. “Honestly, I’m fine,” I tell her. “There’s really no need to worry. I’m just nervous about the trouble that Casey and Cora are going to cause today at school.”
“Oh,” Mom says, drawing back to meet my eyes. “Are you sure that’s it? It seemed like something was really bothering you. Bitchy high-school girls have never been something to get you down before.”
I shrug my shoulders and give her a tight smile. “What can I say?” I tell her, grinning as I used Colton’s exact words that he’d said to me this morning. “These are Colton’s little sisters. I have to play this smart. Now, unless you’re ready to tell me all about how Hendrix’s father was trying to sweep you off your feet on Saturday night, then I better go. Milo should be here any minute and I don’t want to be late.”
Mom’s lips press into a tight line as she steps back, giving me room to walk past her. “For the record,” she says. “He wasn’t trying to sweep me off my feet. We were just two people having a nice time together.”
I raise my brow and together we walk through the pool house. “Uh-huh.”
Mom shakes her head, not ready to get into this with me. “Get out of here, trouble maker. I’ll see you after school.”
With that, I walk out towards the main house, looking back over my shoulder and blowing my mother a kiss. “Love you,” I tell her with a cheesy grin. “Try not to fall for any other rich eligible bachelors while I’m gone.”Chapter 4I’m halfway down the massive front steps of the Carrington mansion when Milo’s shiny Aston Martin comes to a stop at the bottom. He looks up at me through his tinted window and I give him a beaming smile that feels more than fake on my lips.
I continue down to him and as his window slides down, a familiar voice sounds from behind me. “Jade.”
I stop halfway down the stairs and turn back to look up at Colton, having to shade my eyes from the bright early morning sun that stares directly into my eyes. “Yeah?”
Colton’s gaze flashes down to Milo, and he lifts his chin in greeting before glancing back at me with a strange wariness in his eyes. “I, uh … checked on that thing,” he says discreetly.
I raise a brow, my interest more than piqued. “Yeah?” I question slowly, feeling my heart beginning to race in my chest. I hold my breath, anxious to hear what he has to say. His response could change it all. It’s one thing beating a man to near death but actually killing him? Fuck, I know I’ve dreamt about taking his life over and over again but actually doing it? That’s a dark road, one I’ll never come back from.
“It’s wounded,” he says. “But it’s going to be okay.”
A weight lifts off my shoulders and for the first time since running out of that stupid little dungeon, I feel myself able to take a deep breath. Is what I did okay? No, not by a long shot but can I live with the fact that all I did was hurt him? Hell yes, I can.
I let out a shaky breath, not really knowing what to say but as I glance back up at Colton to find his lips pulling into an encouraging smile, my world finally begins to fall back into place. “There’s my girl,” he murmurs from the top of the stairs. “I’d thought I’d lost you for a while.”
His eyes are warm and fuck, I’ve never seen them so full of love. Just like that I know that no matter the outcome of what happened to Jude, Colton wouldn’t have looked at me any differently, and honestly, I don’t know whether that’s a good thing or not. But for now, it’s so much more than I could have asked for.