I squeezed my hand tighter.
He made it another step, a hole appearing in his jeans, along his knee. He shuddered as his chin lifted. “It’s me. I’m here. Evie, I need you to come back to me.”
I didn’t understand how he was still standing. I didn’t understand why he was here, why his voice was drowning out the other, who demanded that I prove I was the strongest, that I was the best.
The front of his shirt ripped. Pinpricks of reddish-blue blood appeared on his cheeks as his pupils gleamed all white.
Tension poured into my muscles as something or someone began screaming in the back of my head. The shirt tore across his chest as he skidded back a foot. He was caving. I could see it in the way his shoulders bent and in the whites of his eyes and the tautness of his mouth. He was power personified.
But I was virtually a god.
Purple Eyes went down on one knee. “Don’t do this,” he gasped, head twisting to the side. Muscles along his neck strained. “Don’t do this.”
I smiled.
He slammed a hand into the ground, barely holding himself up as veins filled with white under his skin. His left hand followed, punching into the loose soil. His back bowed.
“Nadia.” His voice cracked.
I jolted, my entire being recoiled. My concentration weakened. The power flickered and retracted in waves.
Nadia.
She was a girl, a sick and helpless girl. Scared and beaten down, and I was …
He lifted his head once more, the skin of his cheeks flayed. “It’s going to be okay. I promise you.”
A tremor coursed through me. I’d heard that before. He’d spoken those words to me before. A promise …
I never really left you.
Another shudder made its way through me. He’d made those promises. My eyes found his, and his were a beautiful, stunning amethyst. I couldn’t look away from them. My chest rose sharply. Purple eyes. I knew those eyes. Dreamed of them. Missed them. Mourned them. Trusted them.
Gasping, I let go of the power, and it coiled tight, deep inside me, snapping throughout the forest. I threw my head back, screaming as fire and darkness erupted inside me. The burning shadow that had tattooed my skin and coated my muscles, that had entwined itself with my bones and was a part of me.
Had always been a part of me.
Trees groaned under the power’s weight. The ground moaned as I dropped to my knees and pitched forward, letting my cheek rest on the cool grass.
My head wasn’t blank.
My body was once again mine.
I curled inward as a steady stream of thoughts began to trickle in, as consciousness took hold. I was Nadia. I was Evie. I was Peaches. I could feel the cold rain pelting me. It had been Daemon I’d attacked.
Luc I had nearly killed. Luc, who I loved with everything in me.
Oh God.
What was wrong with me?
What was inside me?
Hands were suddenly on me, a gentle touch on my shoulder and hip, but I still flinched. I trembled from my head to my toes.
“Evie,” the voice whispered. Luc. The fingers were at my cheek now, scooping back wet hair. “Evie, open your eyes for me.”
I didn’t want to. I didn’t want to see what I’d done to him.
“Evie, please,” he pleaded, and Luc never pleaded.
“I’m sorry,” I whispered, squeezing my eyes tightly closed. “I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I’m sorry.”
“It’s okay,” Luc said, sliding a hand under my cheek, lifting me from the soaked grass and into his arms. “I’m okay. Look. I’m okay.”
I shook my head, trying to pull away, to put some distance between us because there was something seriously wrong with me, and I couldn’t be trusted.
“There’s nothing wrong with you.”
A harsh laugh retched from me. “There is something very badly wrong with me.”
“Okay.” His hands splayed across my cheeks. “There is probably something a little wrong with you.”
“A little wrong with me? A little? I tried to kill you! And Daemon!” I shuddered as his lips pressed to my forehead. “I almost did.”
“But you didn’t. I’m here.” Those lips of his glided over my cheek. “I’m here, and so is Daemon. Open your eyes and look.”
Taking several deep breaths, I did as he asked. We weren’t alone. The Luxen stood several feet away, in his human form. He was alive, but he didn’t look exactly thrilled.
“I don’t care how he looks,” Luc said, guiding my gaze to him. “Look at me. Please.”
I looked at him.
Where his skin had started to peel away, there was nothing but faint pink marks along his cheeks. He looked like he had a sunburn, but I could still see him in my mind. Thin strips of flesh giving way, ripping—
“Stop.” He cupped my cheeks. “I’m okay. Don’t you see? I’m okay, Peaches.”
“But I hurt you and Daemon,” I whispered, folding my shaking fingers around his wrists. “I was going to kill you both. I stopped, but—”