I walked to the railing, exhaling slowly. “I went to bed last night the happiest man and woke this morning still the happiest man in the world, and now... shit just turned sour within moments of walking into work.”
“Is it yours?”
“She says it is.”
“Well, how do you know for sure?”
Leaning on the balustrade, I turned to him, folding my arms. “The timing makes sense. The last night she was here we were out at the salsa club. Things got hot and heavy. She said she wanted it rough. When we were finished, I saw the condom had broken. She was leaving the next day, so I didn’t give a shit or a second thought.”
“And now she’s here.”
“Claiming the baby’s mine. And I believe her. I’m going to be a father...”
A noise further down the flight of steps caused me to turn around.
I wish I hadn’t.
But it was too late... it was all too late.Chapter 19BrittaHawk’s going to be a father...
The words played over and over, and each time I heard them in my head, it was like taking a blow from a sledgehammer.
Surely, I heard wrong. Surely...
The look on his face, however, told me I hadn’t misheard. Every single word was the truth.
Hawk’s knuckles turned white on the balustrade, his expression one of a distraught, conflicted, angry and remorseful man. He looked like he’d taken a blow to the gut and I felt it, too.
“Is that true?” The words stumbled out. “Is what I just heard true?”
He didn’t answer me. Not because he had chosen not to. It was because he couldn’t. He simply couldn’t find the words.
“Hawk,” I said more forcefully this time. “Are you going to be a father?”
Gravely, he merely nodded his head.
A sob caught in my throat and I gripped the railing to balance myself. I felt weak like my muscles had all been removed. Ricky stepped forward so he could see me, a curious expression passing between Hawk and me.
My emotions threatened to make a scene, and my body took control. It started to retreat, landing heavily on each step back down the three flights of stairs. I could hear the boys bickering but couldn’t hear a word they were saying. Walking onto the street, my legs created their own path, and soon I was somewhere in Central Park even though it wasn’t the direction home.
“Britta!” came a voice behind me. “Britta... wait!”
A rough hand gripped my arm, and I was swung around until I came face to face with Hawk. He was panting, the worry in his eyes still there.
“I didn’t know...” he started. “Not until today.”
“Who... who’s the mother?”
Hawk looked down at the ground, his hands jammed into his pockets.
“Hawk? Who’s the mother of your child?”
“Celeste.”
I was gobsmacked at his announcement. “Celeste? Celeste... the model?”
He nodded. I could see from his expression that he too was miffed that it was her.
Celeste had worked for Carnage Industries as a lingerie model for only a few months. It had turned out she actually knew Ricky years back when she started dating a mutual friend. When things turned sour, and the relationship ended, she moved onto Ricky who’d shut her down. He wasn’t into betraying his friends. When she started working at Carnage, I recognized her face from some group photos on Ricky’s Facebook page.
Now I wish I’d burned her modeling portfolio before she’d set foot in the building.
“I didn’t even know you two were a... what even were you?”
“That’s what makes this shit so unbelievable. We weren’t even anything. It was just a fling which lasted a few nights.”
I took a step back, reeling from the news. News that had turned everything belly up, over something that meant absolutely nothing at the time. A nothing event now created a divide between us.
“So that’s where you were all day today?”
He nodded. “I had a message waiting from Celeste. When I met her at the café and saw the size of her belly, I... I... just had this sinking feeling I was going to walk out of there with my life turned upside down. And that’s exactly what happened.”
I turned away from him, allowing the stray tear to fall unseen. An uneasy silence settled between us, and I gently kicked at the small rocks on the path. “What are you going to do?” I finally choked out.
I knew the answer. I didn’t need to ask. Hawk was raised by a man who above everything else, instilled in him a moral backbone. It was family first, in any situation. He’d always enforced that Hawk grow up and take care of what was his. Now would be no different.
“I have to be in the child’s life,” he said, and I believed his words. Hawk wasn’t the sort of man to run from his responsibilities. He’s step up to the plate. “He... or she... needs a father and that’s me.”