I nodded. “It is a wish. The future, it’s so—” I stopped myself. I didn’t know what I was saying. “We don’t have a lot of time before we leave. You understand, right? And we have to say goodbye to our families. It’s all..” I turned my hands over, palms up. “We just don’t have a lot of time”
She slid her hand off of mine. She slid her hands off the table and leaned back in her chair. “I understand. Of course.”
“But we’ll try,” I said. “I mean, I’d like that.”
She looked off toward the beach and said, “It’s only six months. Six months goes by fast.”
“Our deployment is for eight months.”
She snapped her head around to look at me with a furrowed brow. “Eight months?”
I nodded. “At least.”
“Oh.”
I was definitely saying all the wrong things. I thought again of the photograph I could be looking at while I was away, but I didn’t ask for one. Instead, I finished my latte and stood from my seat. “I have to get back to the base.”
She nodded. “Of course. I understand.”
I leaned over, kissed her on the cheek and began the long walk back.
16
Gwen
If I was their property, I was something akin to a rubber band: being pulled in and released, pulled in and released. When we were together, it was intense. When we were apart, we were very much apart, with long spells where I wouldn’t see them. They always had the same excuses: work or training. They were valid excuses, but that didn’t make it any less frustrating.
They were driving me crazy, and I, in turn, must have been driving Holly crazy with my worries and complaints. But I had good cause.
“Another text saying they can’t go out tonight.” I waved the phone at Holly as if she had been demanding proof.
“So girls night out, then?”
I frowned. “No offense, but I had other expectations.”
Holly scooched over on the couch. She patted the vacated seat. “Come here. Sit down with me.”
I collapsed onto the couch. Holly gave me a hug.
“I hate to see you like this. You worry so much.”
I sighed. “It’s just one thing after another. They said they’d be gone for six months, and now they’re telling me they’ll be gone for eight. We were supposed to go out tonight and now they’ve canceled.”
“They have jobs,” said Holly defensively.
“I know. Listen to me. I’m a spoiled attention-seeking brat.”
“No you’re not.”
My phone vibrated in my hand. I glanced at the screen. “Oh, my—” I stood and nearly threw the phone across the room.
“What is it?”
I shook my head. “It’s nothing.”
“It doesn’t look like nothing.”
I sighed. “It’s Michael.”
Holly’s eyes widened. “Does he still text you?!”
“No, actually this is the first text I’ve got from him in months.” I glanced at the screen again. “And it’s a long one.”
“Don’t read it,” said Holly. “Delete it and block his number.”
I didn’t listen to her. I stood there right in front of her and read the text. “He’s sorry. He says it was all his fault and he’s begging me for another chance.”
“Of course he is,” said Holly. “Don’t write back. Delete the text and block his number.”
“He says he’s been promoted to manager of Tree Top, he got a new apartment but it’s too big for him alone. He’s begging for me to come back.”
Holly took the phone out of my hands and set it on the table. “Too little, too late. You’re seeing someone else, now.”
“Hypothetically,” I said, exacerbated. “I’m only seeing them when they want me to see them. It’s a one-way street.”
Holly rubbed her chin as if she was in deep thought. “I would think that since there’s nine of them, at least one would be available all the time.”
“Right!?” I threw my hands in the air. “But they have these stupid rules like they can’t go on a date with me alone. They think that will lead to competition. They don’t trust each other. If they can’t trust each other, why should I?”
“They have a rule that they can’t go on a date with you alone?” Holly repeated, incredulous.
I chuckled. “Crazy, isn’t it?”
“What other rules do they have?”
I took my phone off the table. “All texts have to go through Travis. That’s one of their rules.”
“That’s strange,” said Holly.
“Well, I’ll send Travis a text then. I think it’s about time I set some ground rules of my own.”
‘Gwen’s rules: rule number one: Gwen’s needs must be met; unless she chooses otherwise, she must be satisfied at least once a week.’
Travis’s response: ‘What’s rule number two?’
Gwen’s response: ‘Let’s worry about rule number one first!’
They booked a room for me at the Marina Hotel. I told them they didn’t need to come all nine together, but that they shouldn’t come alone—not that I wouldn’t have enjoyed some alone time with each of them, but I felt the need to establish some of my own rules. I figured that was a rule they wouldn’t contest.