While I jogged down to the cafe, I was reminded of the exchange I’d had with Travis a while back, how he’d told me to give it time, let things play out naturally. Under ideal circumstances, I might have agreed with him. But we had so much still to accomplish in such a short time. Gwen had expressed frustration when she had to wait a week to see us. Now we were asking her to wait eight months.
When I arrived at The Bean Counter, I didn’t see Gwen. The two girls working, one behind the counter, the other in the dining room, weren’t familiar to me. It was irrational of me, I knew it even at the time, but I felt a sudden and tremendous sense of loss. Gwen is gone, and I’ll never see her again.
I chastised myself for panicking for no reason. That’s not healthy, Nolan. Get it together.
I acted like a rational healthy-minded person and ordered a latte and a cinnamon roll then I asked the girl making my latte if Gwen was around.
“She’s in the kitchen,” she said.
“Would you do me a favor, please, and tell her that Nolan is here?”
“Sure.”
I thanked her and took a seat on the terrace. I chose the table farthest away from the front door, still I felt like all the customers were staring at me. When did I get so paranoid?
When Gwen walked onto the terrace, I stood from my seat. “Nolan!” She beamed and came to me with open arms.
I went to give her a hug, but she gave me a kiss. I didn’t resist. But when she pulled away, I glanced nervously around.
“Are you afraid your girlfriend might see you?”
“What?” I was confused; she was my girlfriend. I failed to pick up on the joke.
“Just kidding,” she said.
“Oh.” I scratched my head.
“Nolan, is everything OK?”
“I don’t know.”
She sat down then I did as well. “What’s going on?”
“I’m having a strange day,” I said.
“Strange?”
She set her hand on the table. I moved my chair closer to her. I took her hand, brought it under the table and held it. “That’s better,” I said.
She’d kicked off her shoe and now she brushed her foot up my leg, looked at me and smiled.
I felt her toes curl against my shin. I got hard real fast, and my erection pressed uncomfortably against my pants.
“Excuse me,” I said as I shifted in my seat and adjusted myself.
As I held her hand, her thumb rubbed back and forth along the side of my finger. She looked into my eyes and smiled.
I adjusted myself again and chuckled. “I shouldn’t wear such tight-fitting pants.”
She laughed. “Live and learn, right?”
I couldn’t help staring at her lips. She was so close; I only needed to lean over and embrace her.
“You look lost in thought,” she said.
I snapped myself from my reverie. “I was lost in your lips, actually.”
She curled her bottom lip and tilted her head. “And you’re not going to kiss them?”
I glanced nervously around me, again.
Gwen whispered. “Everybody’s watching us.”
I chuckled.
She leaned in. “Let them watch.”
I let go of her hand, grabbed her chin and pulled her close. I put my lips to hers. I kissed her bottom lip then her upper lip then both then the right side then the left.
She was not as patient as me, apparently. She put a hand on either side of my jaw, stopped my head from moving and kissed me long and hard.
My tongue met hers, turning and gliding and rubbing. Our lips parted, but I held on to her chin long enough to have my tongue trace the bottom of her lips. She pulled away and let out a heavy breath, as did I.
I touched the side of my face. I still felt her on me and my mouth continued moving slightly as if still engaged in a kiss. It was a dizzying sensation. I took in a deep breath and exhaled. “Intense,” I said.
Her hand touched my knee. “So, what’s this about having a strange day?”
I took a sip of my latte then wiped my mouth. “I don’t know. It’s hard to put into words.” I looked at her with pursed lips. “We’re being deployed.”
She frowned and nodded. “I know.”
“I miss you already,” I said.
She touched me on the cheek and then rested her hand on top of mine. But she didn’t say anything. She didn’t say, ‘But we’ll be together again. But I’ll wait for you.’ She only smiled and patted my hand.
“We’ll see each other before you go,” she said, somewhere between a question and a plea.
“I’d like that,” I said. I could tell from the expression on her face that that wasn’t the right thing to say. “Did I say something wrong?”
She cocked her head to the side. “Well, you just made it sound like it was more of a wish than an eventuality.”