That thought jerked him out of the clouds and brought his feet back down to earth with a jolt. He pulled back from her. He couldn’t lose his head. Because there was absolutely no way he was falling in love. None. He’d promised himself that he would never let himself become that vulnerable again.
“What’s the matter?” Lea asked.
He shook his head and forced a smile to his lips. “Nothing. Nothing at all.” And then his gaze met her confused look. “I... I need to get going. I have to get to the dock.”
“What? But why?”
“Those men I have coming to work on the bungalow—” he checked the time “—should be here now.”
“Oh. Okay.” The look of disappointment on her face was unmistakable.
He longed to take her back in his arms and kiss away her unhappiness, but he stilled himself. To do that—to cave in to his desires—he’d give her the wrong idea. He’d give himself the wrong idea that this relationship was more than a convenience for co-parenting their child.
“I’ll talk to you later.” He turned and started to walk away. He should say something else, but what?
“I’ll see you later,” Lea called out.
He stopped and glanced back. “See you then.”
Xander walked away feeling more confused than ever. And that was a state he wasn’t familiar with. He was a planner, a decision maker. He didn’t have time in his life for indecision—until Lea stepped into his life.
Ever since that first day when his gaze had settled on Lea, he’d known something was different about her. He hadn’t been able to put it into words at the time. And even now, he couldn’t describe the effect she had over him. And he wasn’t eager to examine it too closely.
But he was even more determined to do something special for their baby. He worried about being there for the child emotionally with his own scarred past, but he could do something with his hands—something to show Lea that he cared.
CHAPTER TEN
WHAT IN THE world was that about?
It was the question Lea had been asking herself since she shared that kiss with Xander the previous afternoon. She kept telling herself she’d been trying to comfort him and it had just gone too far. But had it gone too far?
Wasn’t that kiss what she’d been dreaming about night after night? Didn’t she want him to hold her in his arms like he’d done not so long ago? The questions whirled round and round in her mind.
And then she’d waited around last evening hoping they’d have dinner together—a chance to straighten things out—but he hadn’t shown up. She’d even resorted to texting him but he hadn’t responded. When she’d gone to bed, he still hadn’t returned.
And this morning when she’d awakened, she heard the front door banging shut. She glanced at the clock to see if she’d slept in, but she hadn’t. He was up and gone with the sunrise. Was he avoiding her? Did he regret their kiss that much?
The thought of him not enjoying the kiss as much as she had sent an arrow of pain slicing into her chest. She assured herself that it was her pride being wounded and nothing more. It had to be: she knew to be careful with her emotions because people let her down—even if they didn’t mean to.
The much-anticipated arrival of maternity clothes—professional and casual—wasn’t enough to gain her full attention. Not even the little black dress she’d spent too much money on had nudged her out of her subdued mood. She told herself she’d indulged on the dress so she’d have something to wear to oversee the weddings, but she wasn’t that good a liar—she wanted to look good for Xander most of all.
Refusing to dwell on a man who was now avoiding her, she closed the box of maternity clothes and turned her attention back to the computer monitor. She had a handful of new offers to buy the island.
As she scanned the offers, thoughts of Xander came back to her. She recalled how their encounter had started. He’d been trying to talk her into contacting her parents. A part of her knew he was right. But another part of her was still trying to deal with their betrayal. How could she ever trust them again? But she didn’t want to end up like him, with no chance to right what had gone wrong.