“I know I don’t have to say this, but I’m going to anyways. Your parents loved you. Maybe they didn’t always show you how they felt in the way you needed them to.” She squeezed his hand. “But they did until the very end. And they knew you loved them, too.”
He shook his head. He knew she meant well, but she didn’t know the entire situation. She couldn’t. She hadn’t been there. But he wasn’t going to argue with her. It wouldn’t do either of them any good.
“Why did you tell me this?” she asked.
He pulled back a little in order to look directly at her. “You know why I told you.”
“It was more than wanting to share. Were you trying to tell me how important it is for you to have a strong relationship with our child?”
How did she do it? How did she see through him so clearly?
“Yes, I suppose that was part of it. I can’t—I won’t let my child ever doubt my love for him or her.”
A big smile lit up Lea’s eyes and made her whole face glow. “You already love the baby?”
He hadn’t thought about it before. Not in those terms. Love was a word that he avoided. Until now.
He lifted his gaze until he was staring into the greenish blue depths of Lea’s eyes. It was there that he found caring and understanding instead of pity. He drew strength in her compassion.
He knew how risky it was to love someone. He knew they could betray him. They could cut him to the quick. And yet in that moment it was what he craved more than anything.
Xander continued to stare into Lea’s eyes. “Yes, I do.”
Lea’s eyes shimmered with unshed tears. She blinked repeatedly. “I’m head over heels in love with the baby, too. I never knew I could love anyone this much.”
“Enough to give up your dreams here?”
She nodded. “Yes, that much.”
In that moment, he felt a tangible connection to Lea. It was such a strong feeling that he couldn’t actually describe it, but it filled him with warmth.
With his free hand, he reached out to her and traced his finger down her silky-smooth cheek. “Do you know how amazing I find you?”
“You do?” Her voice was barely more than a whisper.
“I do.” His gaze moved to her lips. They lacked any lipstick and yet they were still rosy pink and tempting. When his gaze lifted to meet hers, he caught the spark of interest in her eyes. It made him want her all the more.
“I’m going to kiss you,” he said softly.
“And I’m wondering what’s taking you so long.”
He moved at the same time she did. Their lips met in the middle. He remembered when they’d kissed in the past. It had been full of discovery and curiosity. This time, though, his mouth moved over hers knowing what she liked.
They may have only spent a long weekend together a few months ago, but the memory of her kiss was tattooed upon his mind. Their kisses had gone on and on, partly from an unending desire and partly because he knew it would end soon and he wanted—no, he needed—to remember the way she felt in his arms and the way she tasted so sweet like ripe, red berries. But those memories were nothing compared to the real thing.
As his mouth moved over hers, coaxing her to open up to him, he realized just how much he’d missed this—missed her. He’d tried fighting it. He’d told himself it wasn’t her but the human connection that he missed. He’d told himself that he’d worked too hard for too long. He needed to spend some time away from the office.
But now, as his fingers slid down over Lea’s cheek to her neck, he knew he’d been lying to himself. He’d craved Lea all of these weeks and it had nothing to do with his workload or his lack of a social life. It had only to do with Lea and how much he’d missed her.
Her hands slipped up over his shoulders, up his neck. Her fingers combed through his hair as her nails scraped over his scalp, setting his nerve endings atingle. A moan swelled within the back of his throat. If they weren’t here on the beach in the middle of the resort, he would definitely take things further.
Before things got totally out of control, he had to stop this madness. But he made no motion to pull away from her. He needed her more than he needed oxygen—