Others needed him more urgently. Her news, her needs, could wait a little longer.
Besides, she shied from the possibility he’d freeze when he heard her admission.
Perhaps he’d reject her. She wasn’t ready for that.
Her love for him had grown so much, obliterating her doubts once she saw beneath the mask he presented the world. She wanted to stay and make him happy. Prove to him love was possible and that they could have far more than a marriage of convenience. That they could make a family together.
She was so preoccupied it took her a while to realise the stir she caused as she moved through the palace much later in the day. Everyone looked at her differently, from servants to officials and visitors waiting for appointments.
Overnight the news of where Tahir had spent the night must have spread. Or perhaps it was the way he’d blurted out news of her pregnancy in public.
People refused to meet her gaze, bowing lower than ever as she passed, yet she felt their eyes on her back. Heat crawled up her throat and into her cheeks as she entered an audience chamber to be greeted by a cessation of all conversation. No doubt they’d been gossiping about the latest royal scandal, confirmed by the Sheikh himself.
Stiffening, her pulse thudding, Annalisa paused, grateful that she’d again worn one of the beautiful gowns Rihana had pressed on her. She might feel small and insignificant, but at least she looked as if she belonged in this world of wealth and finery.
She lifted her chin, forcing down the impulse to spread her hand over her abdomen in a telltale protective gesture.
Did they assume she was simply the latest in the long series of Tahir’s conquests?
Her stomach plunged. Remembering how he’d left so abruptly, and his air of distraction, maybe they were right. Was she kidding herself that Tahir could feel more for her than duty and physical pleasure?
He’d shared some of his past but that didn’t mean he loved her.
Yet she refused to give up her dreams without a fight. She owed it to her baby too, to try and build a meaningful marriage.
Turning on her heel, she spun round and marched to Tahir’s offices. His senior private secretary was alone in the outer office.
‘Excuse me,’ she said, approaching his desk. ‘I wonder if you can help me with some information?’
‘Of course.’ He stood abruptly, his expression uncomfortable as he shot a glance towards the other office.
Instantly a premonition hit Annalisa. A feeling of impending disaster. These last weeks she’d developed an easy relationship with Tahir’s staff. What had changed?
The secretary’s eyes dipped fleetingly to her waist and her poise almost crumbled. Of course. News of her pregnancy and a potential scandal changed everything.
Warily she let him lead her towards a private sitting room partly screened from the main area.
Her lips twisted bitterly. Was she such an embarrassment she had to be ushered from sight?
‘I’d like you to look up the King’s appointments,’ she said as they walked, her voice a little too strident as she fought embarrassment and anger. ‘We’re marrying next week and I need details of the time and location so I can arrange some invitations.’
If she was going to fight for Tahir, attempt to turn this into a real marriage, she’d start as if it were real. She’d proudly invite her family. Every last cousin. She refused to let Tahir turn their wedding into a hole and corner affair, as if he were ashamed of her.
The secretary halted so abruptly Annalisa almost walked into him.
‘I’m sorry,’ he muttered. ‘Pardon me.’ He turned but didn’t meet her eyes. ‘Won’t you take a seat?’
She shook her head, watching with growing concern the way he clasped and unclasped his hands, clearly ill at ease.
‘No, thanks. I’d rather stand. Now, about the wedding?’
He swallowed hard, as if clearing a constriction in his throat. Still he didn’t look her full in the face.
‘I’m sorry, I…’ He paused, looking back to the office as if seeking help.
‘You were saying? Just the time and location will do.’
‘I’m afraid…’ He stopped and finally met her eyes. ‘I’m afraid you’ll have to talk to the King. He’s altered the arrangements.’
‘Yes?’ Annalisa’s skin prickled as that prescience of trouble grew stronger. ‘How did he alter them?’
‘He’s cancelled them.’
Annalisa heard the words echo through her, felt their impact like the slow motion force of a traffic collision.
Blindly she groped for support, clutching the back of a chair with shaking fingers.
Only yesterday Tahir had referred to their wedding. Why change his mind? Had he read her neediness and her emotions even though she hadn’t voiced them? Had he understood how she felt and decided to weather the scandal rather than lumber himself with a woman so obviously in love with him?