Chapter 10
It’s so hard to look like I’m not uncomfortable. It’s hard to look relaxed when I’m not wearing anything at all, except for my mask, and more than anything I wish my heart would stop hammering in my chest when I do this.
God, when does this get easier? If I could sacrifice the leftovers in my fridge to an unseen god for an answer to that question, I would in an instant.
“Sorry,” I laugh, trying to sound pleasant, amicable, and flirtatious. I succeed, I think. At least, my viewer count isn’t going anywhere, so that’s saying something. With it being Friday, I had expected the count to be low. But instead, it’s higher than it has been before. I’ve caught and held about forty viewers for this whole time, and once I’m pretty sure that number had gone up into the low fifties.
“But I’m about to end the stream.” I sit back on my chair, one knee up and toes curled over the edge of my desk chair. A viewer, who is surprisinglynotrob784, begs me again to touch myself.
But I really don’t want to. Not when I want to go drink coffee and eat the mint chip ice cream that’s screaming my name from the freezer.
“Next time, okay?” I ask, lips curled into a sweet smile. Or, so I hope. “Catch me before I’m about to head off…” I trail off as four different men flood the chat, begging me to stay longer and saying they’ll make it worth my time.
At least, until a tip of eighty fucking dollars comes through from one of my now-favorite people on this earth.MalevolentMaskmessages right after sending the money, causing my smile to grow into something more genuine.
Now that I’m top tipper, I get to ask you for something, right?I blink at the message, hesitant. I can’t turn down his request with a tip like that, can I?
“What did you have in mind, new friend?” I ask, hooking my arm over the back of the chair.
End your stream and go buy yourself a really great fuckin’ meal. They don’t deserve you.
My eyebrows shoot up at the request, and my fingers stop tapping on the wood of my chair as I blink once, then again. “Well, you all know the rules.” I laugh, dropping my knee so I can lean closer to my laptop. “Highest tipper wins, and that is definitely the highest of the day. Besides, it really is time for me to go, and I don’t have a lot of free time outside of what I spend with all of you.” I bite my lip, hoping I look cute or shy or whatever gets these guys off, instead of like some species of beaver.
Some of the men wish me a good weekend, while a few others make remarks about me not doing what they wanted, but I ignore those. There’s nothing else I can do; because I refuse to entertain some of them since they are just… not very nice. Hitting the button to turn off my camera, I grab my trusty red tee and pull it on over my head, along with my pajama shorts that barely cover more than my ass. As usual, Juniper won’t be home for a while. I have the apartment to myself and I can decompress from this new, interesting way to make money.
The notification for my inbox lights up as I carry my laptop to the bed. My heart twists, butterflies take flight in my stomach, and I can’t help but hope it’sThrillingTerror. OrMalevolentMask,but he’s never messaged me after the first time.
Sitting down, however, I sigh as I see that the message isn’t from either of them.
It’s from Rob.
Fuck Rob.
But I also can’t just leave it there. I can’t alienate one of my few fans, no matter how annoying he is, when he diligently returns stream after stream to watch me do very little. I’m boring, no matter whatThrillingTerrorsays. If I wasn’t, then I’d have more viewers. Not just the few that trickle in while I stream. Sure, forty-two was a lot. But I doubt it’ll happen again.
Is your semester going well, MaskedEnvy? The message makes me shudder as I read it, and I hate that he knows I’m in college.
Hell, I barely remember talking about it on stream. For the most part, I like to keep my life under wraps with these people. I don’t need them figuring out who I really am. But I’m also pretty certain that half of my appeal is the fact that I’m a college student.
I can’t ignore it, so I politely type back that I am and I hope his evening goes well before clicking out of the message and ignoring when it lights up again.
Sure, I can’t totally ignore him. But I shouldn’t need to encourage him too much, either. If he wants to keep watching, great. I’m pretty sure he’s never tipped me, so I’m notthatattached to him staying.
My eyes flick down the notifications, and I delete the stupid spam messages about me being gorgeous and someone wantingto meet up with me. I don’t want to meet up with any of these men… with one or two exceptions.
And somehow, as I clean out my inbox, both exceptions suddenly appear, sending messages within a few seconds of each other.
I openMalevolentMask’s message first, letting out a breath as I read it.
You’re always so good when you stream, you know? But you don’t have to be so nervous. I promise no one is ever thinking bad about you, okay? How could they, when you’re you?There’s a string of emojis after it that make me snort, and I take a moment before typing back my reply.
How can I not be? Have you seen some of the things they want me to do? I’m willing to get myself off on stream with a vibrator, but not with fucking vegetables. Also, I really appreciate what you did. It kind of feels like I rely on a few of you to help me end my stream sometimes.
His reply is almost instant.
Yeah, the vegetable thing is weird. But I’m pretty sure I saw someone saying they wanted to see you with a tail. You know, the kind that doesn’t clip on. Don’t hate me, but do you know how hot that would be on you? Pretty sure you could just get on your knees and wiggle for an hour and people would throw money at you. And hey, it’s no problem. You’re just too nice to tell them to fuck off, so I’ve got you.
I snort at the message, shaking my head.Sure buddy,I say, and take a moment before I add on to it.I don’t know about that. I doubt my ass is that enticing. Plus, I’ve seen some of those. They look like they’re painful if you’re stupid about, uh, attaching them. And I’m kind of stupid.