When he doesn’t reply straight away, I figure I’ve turned him off. If anything, he’s probably not looking for someone to tellhim that she’s not interesting. A good streamer would’ve flirted with him, made him more interested and more engaged with her stream.
I’m, quite obviously, not very good at this.
I didn’t ask for that.
My heart jolts with surprise when he responds. I’d assumed he was long gone by now, but here he is, still talking to me.
I know how many other girls stream, love. They aren’t that interesting to me. Does it bother you that I’m interested? Do you want me to leave you alone?
Every stranger danger lesson I’ve ever been taught is screaming a big, loudyesin my brain. I don’t know him. He could be as unpleasant as rob784 if I don’t keep talking to him. If I don’t give him the answers he wants, he could turn mean and stop watching my stream.
So, even though I know I should politely excuse myself and say that I’m busy, when I reply, it isn’t with the smart thing.
Not one bit.
I don’t want you to leave me alone. I just don’t want to disappoint you.
I bite my lip as I wait for his reply, but he’s nice enough not to keep me waiting for very long.
I don’t think you could, love,he says, and again I wish we were actually talking so I could hear his voice.What are you doing? Am I keeping you from anything?
No.I’m quick to type the word and send it, then I follow up with,I’m just sitting on my bed talking to you. As if that doesn’t sound weirdly obsessive or desperate.
Or both.
Another message comes through from Rob and I frown, not caring enough to open it. Fuck Rob. He’s not the important person in my inbox right now.
If you need to go, don’t let me hold you up, all right? I didn’t mean to keep you for this long anyway, but I enjoy talking to you.
What are you doing?I ask, turning his question back on him.Am I keeping you from something?
Not at all. Not one bit. I have all the time in the world for you. And I’m just sitting on my couch hating that I missed the first part of your stream.
Even if it wasn’t the interesting part? I ask, pausing to listen for Juniper. I doubt she’ll be home for a while, but still. There’s no harm in being careful.
It’s all interesting to me.
Why?Sure. It should be obvious. I doubt the answer is going to be anything other than ‘because you’re hot’ or whatever, but I ask anyway. I want to know, at least, and my expectations are low enough that if he doesn’t meet them, I’ll be incredibly astounded.
Didn’t I tell you already, love? Because I find you immensely interesting. I enjoy watching you, and hearing you talk. I’d rather you talk more about what you like instead of letting your viewers bully you into taking your clothes off sooner.
Ouch. The suggestion hurts, because he’s right. Anytime I think I have control of my stream, that I won’t give into anyone’s demands of nudity, I prove myself wrong when the crowd mentality istake it off.
I’m getting better at it, though. At least, I like to think I am. And besides, I haven’t done more than teased. I haven’t done more than take my bra off yet.
That’s good for me, right?
So talk to me, won’t you? What do you like? What are you into? Do you like being watched?
The rapidfire questions give me whiplash, but I answer the first one, anyway.
I’m into art. Don’t judge me, please. I want to do more, and I know it’s not exactly a field where I’d be swimming in money, but I want to be an art historian. Maybe I’ll teach on the side, or something. I like folklore way too much, and actually I’m kind of into photography right now.
Weirdly, that is. It’s hard to be into it when Professor Solomon is such a terrifying jerk, but I get by.
He doesn’t reply for a few moments, and I worry again that I’ve lost him.
Why photography?