“You were twelve. A little girl. Monsters—even beyond what I imagined.”
I don’t say anything, because there’s nothing to say. It’s true.
51
ANTONIO
As I go out to the porch where Rafael is trying to cope, I’m grateful I brought Daniela. My mother and Rafa need light and goodness after what I just dropped on them. They need empathy. Compassion. But a vicious rage is pumping through my veins right now, and all I can offer at this moment is darkness.
My father is dead, and Abel is reduced to little more than a shell, but Tomas? Before I’m finished with him, Tomas is going to beg for death.
Rafael’s at the window, looking over the city, shoulders hunched, dissecting his life, looking for damning clues, and wondering if he’s a monster too. I ask myself that same question nearly every day. But I won’t let him go down that path. I won’t let it eat away at him.
“You are not them. Just like I’m not them. We carry the same name, the same genes, but not the same heart. Don’t ever forget it.”
“How long have you known?” he asks, still staring out the window. His voice is hollow, but I hear the pain—the self-loathing.
“I learned about it the morning after the wedding.”
He nods. “What are we going to do about it?”
“We’re not going to do anything. This is mine to handle.”
He swivels to face me, anger sparking in his eyes. “No way. Don’t you dare leave me out of this. I’m a man. And whatmyfather, andmybrother, andmyuncle did was reprehensible.”
He might be a man, but some part of him will always be a boy to me. “Yes, you are a man. And yes, what they did was beyond reprehensible. But the kind of vengeance you want stains souls. I won’t allow it to stain yours.”I won’t.He had a rough beginning, but I’ll be damned before he’s burdened with that kind of guilt.
“And what am I supposed to do now? Sit on my hands and let God sort it out?”
There will be a reckoning long before it gets to God. “I have a job for you.”
He lengthens his spine and peers directly into my eyes. “Anything. What do you need?”
“Things are about to become unpredictable in Porto. I’m concerned that my mother will be at some risk, even here. Will and Samantha have agreed to take her in. She’ll be safe there. But she won’t stay without some incentive. You’re that incentive. I need you there too.”
“Antonio. No.” He shakes his head vigorously. “I’m not hiding. I’m done hiding from them.”
“I’m not asking you to hide. I’m giving you an important job. The responsibility for my mother’s safety. No one is going to be able to get her to stay there—I need to give her a reason to stay. You are that reason.”
He clasps his hands at the base of his neck and tips his head back. I’ve put him in a difficult position. As much as he seeks bloodshed, he knows my mother’s safety is not something I take lightly. Neither does he.
“I trust you more than anyone to get in touch with me if it seems like she’s even beginning to think about leaving. I have a lot on my plate, and this is something you can take off it. I can’t lose her to this, Rafael.”
He nods and meets my gaze. “You won’t.”
I plan on telling my mother something similar. It’s manipulative, but I won’t lose either of them to this.
“Am I still welcome at the house?”
“What house?”
“Your house in the valley. She’s your wife, and my brother—she was a little girl—I remember her. How could Tomas have possibly done something so vile?”
It’s worse than you know.“It was on my father’s order. I don’t think there’s any doubt about it.” I pause for a moment. What I say next will leave a lasting impression, and I don’t want to make a mistake. “The house in the valley is your home. Does Daniela seem like the type of woman who would forbid you from going home?”
“She’d have every right to.”
She would.