“Ugh. Dick.” Her pretty face pinches. “I hope you called him out.”
“Oh, yeah, I’d say so.” Was that scene as bad in real life as it’s playing out in my head? “We started arguing in the middle of the bar. And then my mom showed up—”
“What?” Justine’s eyes widen. “Your mom was there and I missed her? Dammit!” For all the stories Justine has heard about the infamous Dottie Reed, she’s never met her.
I wince as her loud curse thumps in my head. “Come back next weekend. She’ll be there on Friday. And every Friday. Apparently, she’s a regular there now too. Of course, she is.” There’s nowhere in town I’m safe anymore.
“So, she came and then what happened?”
“Oh! Well, then I found out Dean slept with her five years ago and, no, I’m pretty sure he wasn’t going to tell me before we hooked up. And the worst part is, I don’t want big, dumb Dean.” What was I thinking, moving in on him like … well, like my mother. I shudder at the comparison. “Then I embarrassed myself in front of about fifty people and ran out.”
“And Shane followed you.”
“Yeah, so we could fight some more and make out in the street.”
Justine gasps again. “No way.” She’s loving this drama.
“Uh-huh.” I close my eyes and try to imagine his lips on mine again. I so wish I had been sober for that part of it.
“He’s going to break off this date with the other woman, right?”
“I doubt it. I told him I expected him to stay celibate until I trusted him again.”
“Yikes.”
“And then I told him to stay the hell away from me. They’ll probably get married and have babies. I’ll get to teach their children too,” I add dryly. “Oh, and he said that he broke up with me because I was too complicated.”
“Too complicated?” she echoes.
“Yeah. I guess I had trust issues and a chip on my shoulder. I was too complicated, and he wanted easy, so that’s why he dumped me and went with Penelope.” My archenemy.
“Hmm.” Silence hangs as Justine stares up at my bedroom ceiling.
I know that look on her face. “What is it?” I ask warily.
She sighs. “You know I love you, right? You are my person. Like, if I were gay, you’d be my wife right now. Or even bi. I’d take you over Bill in a second.”
I smirk. “I’d have to be gay too, though.”
“It doesn’t matter. You wouldn’t be able to resist my charms.”
“You’re an idiot.” And yet her words warm my chest.
“So are you, if you can’t admit to me out loud right now that you still have feelings for this guy.”
“It doesn’t matter if I—”
“Admit it!” she barks, making me grimace at the throb in my temple.
I swallow the rising stir of emotions as I say, “I still have feelings for Shane Beckett.”
“Serious, deep feelings,” she coaxes.
I sigh with exasperation. “I still have serious, deep feelings for Shane Beckett.” Unexpectedly, a weight lifts from my chest. “How stupid am I? He’s just going to hurt me again.”
She snorts. “I’m the moron who took Bill back six years after he left me to marry Debra.” But then she says more seriously, “You still have feelings for the guy. You’re not stupid at all, Scarlet.” She hesitates. “But he’s not wrong about the complicated part. I mean, for the first six months we lived together, I wasn’t sure if you liked me.”
I laugh. “What are you talking about? We hung out all the time.”
“Yeah, because I forced myself on you. I assumed you were only tolerating me and you’d eventually murder me in my sleep.”
“Seriously? You’re my best friend.” I chuckle. “Oh my God, that’s so dumb.”
“What? You can be intimidating. Ask Bill. He’ll tell you. He thought you hated him too.”
“I didn’t exactly love him at first,” I confess. The drama of their relationship has always been off the charts.
“And you’re really hard to read. I mean, not for me anymore, because I know you better than I know anyone else in the world, but you don’t let people get close to you. You don’t trust anyone. And I don’t blame you,” she rushes to add. “If half the things you’ve said about Dottie are true—”
“They’re all true.”
“There you go. Look at what you grew up with. You have a selfish mom, you don’t know your father—”
“Don’t Doctor Phil me, please.” The truth is, I’m not blind. I’m acutely aware of all the ways my upbringing and family dynamics are lacking.
“Fine. But in the twelve years I’ve known you, you’ve never had a boyfriend who you cared about keeping.”
“That’s because they were all losers.” Guys who didn’t know what they wanted in life, or only wanted one thing. I saw through all of them from day one and didn’t give them an ounce more of myself than I was willing to gamble with.