I just needed to figure out how to give it.
Chapter 24 Ren
Iwas shattered.
It was the only way to describe how I felt as I puttered around the kitchen, sad and lonely as I tried not to think about Grammy. I was mostly okay. I mean, I saw her off and watched her go with Gramps, so I wasn't sad for her. This grief was more about me and knowing I wouldn’t see her smile or hear her voice and just have her close.
Sighing because I couldn’t think about the loss without tearing up, I tried to keep busy by tidying up. It didn’t work, and before I knew it, I was thinking about Caleb again. After Grammy passed, he was so great. So present and unlike the angry man I first met. But as Caleb was wont to do, he eventually got spooked and pulled away again, and now he was working for the pack so much I hardly saw him.
“What a happy mating.” I scoffed, hating the derision in my tone because it wasn’t me.
Doll, seriously, if you weren’t snide or snarky, I’d think you were losing it. No one can blame you for not silver lining this.
“No. I don’t suppose they could.” I mumbled, smiling sadly but frowning when I heard a noise outside and peered out through the window.
Sensing something, I felt my nape prickle, and something, some knowing, told me I needed to call Caleb. It was so strong that I didn’t fight it, and as I lunged for the phone, sudden, overwhelming terror filled me.
My wolf was screaming at me now, howling that I needed to get help, but as I lifted the phone to call, I felt a sharp pain in my head and cried out.
It burst through me as a sharp blow to the back of my skull, and I knew I had been hit from behind as my knees buckled and everything went dark. My body crumpled, my knees turning to jelly, and then I was sinking to the floor as darkness overtook me.
Caleb
“If you’re here to lecture me, don’t,” I warned as I got out of my truck and walked up to the porch where my brothers were waiting.
It was past midnight, I was tired and frustrated by the Joe Carver case and plain irritated with myself. In the weeks since Grammy passed on, I had been flailing so badly I'd done the one thing I always seem to do when things got hard. I was running, my inability to help Ren through her grief making me feel like such a failure. I hated myself.
We were mated now, and I was getting over that, but more than that, Ren and I were friends. Or we used to be. Now, things were awkward and hard, and I knew it was all on me because I had no idea how to deal with this. Joyce was easy. As long as I gave her what she wanted and kept her in designer clothes, she was happy, and I didn’t have to make any real effort.
With Ren, it was different. She didn’t like designer things, would scalp me if I spent that much money on anything, and didn’t seem to care about status. I had no clue how to make her happy, and that, more than anything, was throwing me off.
“Then stop being an ass. Look, man, we love you, but you must be dumb as a stump if you’re willing to ruin this before you’ve even started.” Trey said, scowling when I growled and glared at him.
I still hadn’t gotten over the fact that he wanted to mate my Ren, and I didn’t know that I ever would. Some of it was jealousy, a sick slide of disgust as I looked at him and wondered if he wouldn’t have been better. He was suave, stylish, and always smiling. Maybe Ren would have been better off with him.
“Don’t. I’m tired, and all I want to do is go to sleep.”
“With your mate?” Cole asked, smirking when I flinched because we all knew Ren slept in the guestroom.
“Fuck off.” I huffed, frowning when I realized the house was dark. “Ren asleep?”
“Don’t know. Must be. We didn’t knock, seeing as we didn’t want to intrude.” Cole said, shrugging when I unlocked the door and stepped inside.
“Well, you’re not invited—”
I stopped talking as I shuffled inside, my bear letting off a dark growl before I sniffed and realized something was very, very wrong.
“Is that blood?” Trey yelled, rushing in ahead of me before I could move, my body growing tense.
“Blood.” Cole gasped when we got to the kitchen, the only room in the house that was lit.
“Ren. Ren!” Trey yelled, rushing by us to storm up the stairs while I knelt on the floor near the sink and felt my blood turn to ice.
There was a lot of blood, and I didn’t need to sniff it to know it belonged to my mate. Growling, I twisted my head to sniff again, and when I caught a scent, a faint something, I threw my head back and roared.
More importantly, my bear roared and started to vibrate so strongly that I felt as if my blood was on fire.
Mine, it snarled, the murderous rage writhing through me, a shock, as I felt the full force of an animal, I hadn't thought much of in years. Strong, I realized, my heart pounding as my teeth ground together. He was so fucking strong I felt like I was going to explode out of my skin when he roared again and started to whine.