It takes all of five minutes to polish off three slices, and when I lean back and rub my stomach, Harlow snags the last piece and practically inhales it.
“Where’s Malachi?” I ask, spinning around to look out over the main room.
“He’s at Nico’s place getting the last of his security system set up.”
My heart rate speeds up at the mention of the man who sent me spiraling. I don’t know what I expected but hearing that he’s going to be in Atlantic City long enough to have a place and need a security system installed isn’t it.
“He’s been asking about you, ya know? Shows up here every day and sits outside your bedroom door in case you open it.”
“Who?” I ask, although I already know.
Not only has he continued to send me my daily morning texts, but Nico also talks to me from the other side of the door. I don’t respond, but I know he’s there. And despite my reaction to him a week ago, a sense of peace washes over me when I hear him. I can’t explain it, so I don’t even bother bringing it up.
“Seriously, Pep? You know damn well who.”
“What have you told him?”
“Nothing beyond that you’re healing.”
“Am I, Har? Healing?” I hug my waist and think about how fucked up I am to be terrified of a man who also makes things better. “I mean, I know I’m physically improving. And yeah, I guess I am mentally, too, but…”
“But what?”
“What if I’m triggered again?” That’s the biggest question that stops me from opening that damn door.
“Then we deal with it,” she responds, as if losing my shit is nothing to worry about. Harlow sighs and bumps my shoulder with hers. “But I think you’re more scared that you might not get triggered, that Nico will crash through all the walls and defenses you’ve carefully crafted over the years.”
“I let people in.”
“You letmein.Me, Pep. I’m one person. Besides you kept a lot of barriers in place until last week, so I’m not sure I even count.”
“Bullshit. I’ve let all our sisters in. And I let Malachi in, didn’t I?”
“You can argue with me all you want, but deep down, you know I’m right. The people who were supposed to love you unconditionally, didn’t, and because of that, you don’t invite anyone close enough to risk that kind of pain again. I get it, P. I really do. You know that about me better than anyone.” Harlow rests a hand on my shoulder. “But maybe it’s time to open yourself up a little. Take a risk. You’ve got the support and the love of not only me, but also of all the DHMC sisters and Malachi. Jump, P. I promise you we’ll be there to catch you if you fall.”
She leans in and kisses me on the cheek before hopping off her stool and walking to join the others at the pool table.
Now what the fuck am I supposed to do?
CHAPTER8
Nico
Sun streams through the window,and I curse myself for not remembering to pull the blinds down before climbing into bed last night. I roll away from the offending light, tugging the black Egyptian cotton sheet over my face. As sleep begins to drag me back under, my cell phone chimes with a notification.
“You’ve got to be kidding me,” I mumble.
Without moving my head from under the sheet, I blindly reach my hand out and pat around my nightstand until my fingers hit the phone. I bring the cell close to my face and squint, trying to make out the text. It takes a second, but it quickly comes into focus and what I read sends my pulse skittering.
Peppermint: Morning.
One thousand percent sure I’m reading it wrong, I rub my eyes with a fist to clear the sleep from them. I read the text again, and then a third time before it sinks in that my tired brain isn’t deceiving me.
I push the sheet away and slide up the bed to lean against the wall, groaning at the cold surface. I have a headboard ordered, but the company will only deliver it when I’m home and that hasn’t been much this past week. All of my belongings were shipped from Seattle, but the fucking bed frame was damaged in transit.
I type out a response to Peppermint but delete it and start again. I don’t get the text sent before another message pops up from her.
Peppermint: Are you seriously going to ignore me?