Not much of Drake was left.
His inner organs removed. His eyes pecked out by vultures. His tongue chomped on by a beagle. His torso the only thing left with no arms or legs.
“Wait,” I whispered, splaying my membrane wings and swooping to stand over Drake.
The wolves paused, sitting on their haunches as I did the same and cupped Drake’s cheek.
Sticky with blood and ice, ice cold, Drake mumbled with a tongueless mouth something I couldn’t understand.
His empty eye sockets couldn’t relay a message.
His missing lungs couldn’t draw breath.
He was well and truly my prisoner, unable to run, beg, or strike. For a man who’d been spoiled and privileged his entire life, being reduced to nothing but a pile of viscera and bones was a savage and fitting end.
“I’m leaving you now. I’m leaving you within this nightmare where you can never die. That is your true punishment, Drake. Not being mauled and devoured but never being whole again. You took so many pieces of my happiness. You never let me be who I could’ve become because you took so much of my trust. This…this is my attempt at showing you how it feels to exist with parts of you missing. Parts you need to be a functional individual. Parts that are integral to being human.”
I scanned the animals, their peace granting me peace. Their satisfaction doing its best to fill the emptiness within me. I’d done my best at plugging up my holes by caring for those far more innocent than me. I’d fought my love for Eleanor because it showed me just how much I’d failed at life.
This was the burnout I’d been running from. The absolute acknowledgment that I couldn’t be saved. That I didn’t want to be because I hadn’t done enough to be absolved. My lack of trust had been exhausting. My life of loneliness had been miserable.
If this was the end…at least I would be free of such things.
Eleanor would be free of me making further mistakes.
The world would be free of my entitlement and black and white rules.
Looking down at my bleeding brother, I accepted our joint end.
I chose a fate far more fitting for a man like me and let the burnout wash over me. I was tired. So, so fucking tired. It was almost a relief to stop trying. And besides, thanks to Tritec, I was most likely dead anyway—whether I chose such a finale or not.
“I’ve made my choice, Drake. Just like you stole pieces from me, I refuse to keep on living with them gone. I was kidding myself to think I could heal. That Eleanor was the cure I needed. A devil cannot change his colours…not after he’s embraced such a calling—not when we are true brothers and share the same sickness and sadism.”
I ran my hands through his bloody hair. “But don’t worry, brother. My time is short so you won’t suffer too long. When I feel my heart failing, I’ll come back for you. We can die together…just like we were raised together.”
Standing, I bowed at the creatures who’d formed a semi-circle around Drake and the fire. “Guard him. Nibble some more if you get hungry.”
A lone wolf howl made Drake’s eyeless sockets weep.
I looked one last time at the most horrific thing I’d done.
I waited for regret, for shame, for some barometer of right and wrong to tell me I’d gone too far.
But just like I was empty, I was grateful too.
Grateful that Drake was dealt with.
Soon, I would be dealt with.
And the circle of life for two monsters would be complete.
But before that happened…
Before I took my last inhale and accepted my encroaching death, I had a goddess I wanted to make love to one last time. A woman to adore and a queen who wore a priceless crown.
A crown that needed one last jewel to be complete.
It needed my heart because she was the one and only owner of it.
She could cut it from my chest and chisel it into a diamond because only in her care could it be redeemed.
Tucking up my wings, I inhaled a sharp breath.
I didn’t have another sedative to knock me out of this fantasy.
But I did have a thrice broken leg just waiting to black me out if I put full pressure on it.
Gritting my fangs, I stepped forward.
I walked in the illusion.
I tripped in real life.
My bones fractured further.
My ankle shattered.
My toes cracked.
I passed out and left the realm of myth.
Chapter Nine
I LOST HIM.
In the inky blackness of fake slumber, I felt a severing of our bond.
A decision I couldn’t undo.
A finality I couldn’t stop.
I sat at the bottom of a pit. A pit with no walls to climb and no air to breathe. Dark and dismal, it kept me far away from the light of consciousness.
I couldn’t wake up.