I shook my head. “No, I think I’ll take a walk outside, get some fresh air. When is my next appointment?”
“Not until three, you have time. Maybe grab lunch too.”
I stood and walked out the double doors attached to my office. The path there led to the garden. It was a beautiful day and I figured I’d sit and take my lunch outside.
As I watched the water flow out of fish statue’s mouth in the fountain, my mind once again went to Crew. Maybe this was simply because last night was fresh in my mind and it would pass. Yes, that had to be it. I didn’t want attachments and Crew and I would never work. His job alone was an issue and…I swore after Leslie and our kids died; I’d never form that kind of connection with a person again.
So why did I want to say fuck it to that promise, find Crew, and beg him to only be with me? That man had a hold on me that if I wasn’t aroused by it, I’d be terrified.
14
Crew
“Do you not like your fish?”
I looked up from my plate into Jerry’s kind blue eyes. He really was sweet for a criminal attorney. His smile wasn’t filled with disdain for the scum he represented. He had a full head of dark hair and was ridiculously handsome. Probably every gay boy’s wet dream, and yet all I could think about was Ben.
“It’s delicious, sorry. Am I destroying this date?”
He wiped his mouth with the napkin and placed it beside his empty plate. “Not at all. You’re sexy and tell very good stories. I only lost you there for a moment.” He cocked his head to the side. “I’d asked how you enjoyed working with Ben Asher and then you sort of zoned.”
Sounded about right. “Supernal is fantastic, the guys there have all been welcoming, and working for Mr. Asher has been…” What was the word I was looking for?
“Has been?” Jerry smirked, like he knew.
“He’s probably the best man I’ve ever had the honor of knowing.” Yeah, that felt right.
“Wow!” He chuckled. “That’s possibly the greatest compliment I ever heard anyone give someone.”
I shrugged, not sure why I was trying to play it off like what I said meant nothing. “He’s…”
“Oh no.” Jerry held up his hands, a huge grin on his handsome face. “I know, and, shit…”
“What?”
“Does he know how much you want him?”
My breath caught, how’d Jerry know? “Me?”
“Please don’t be upset, and don’t think the world knows. I’m a lawyer, one who talks to more criminals than the average person. I read people very well.”
“Honestly, I have zero idea if he knows how I feel. Well, I mean, he knows I’m attracted to him and honestly, that’s all I thought there was but every day, more and more, he’s shown me different sides of himself. He’s easy to want to know.”
Jerry folded his hands and rested his chin on them. “Tell him.”
I snorted. “He’s complicated.”
He hummed. “Yeah, his past does present a problem I suppose.”
My eyes widened. “You know?”
Jerry solemnly nodded. “Lawyer, remember? I’ve known Ben for a long time. I actually helped him and Leslie at one time with her boss.” He stopped talking and leaned in. “Am I wrong in guessing Ben told you the story?”
“He did.”
“Good. I can see it in your eyes.”
“So you knew Leslie?”