Laura’s mouth slackened. “Says who? This is a six-bedroom house, paid for outright by Toby’s trust fund. We’ve lived together since our second year at university, and you know I always say it, but there wouldn’t be a Toby and me if it weren’t for you! Skylar joined our family. I’m looking forward to her helping me, the way we helped you when she was little. She’s going to be an amazing big sister and, come on, admit it, there is more than enough room.” Laura giggled. “Think of how many bodies we had lying around during our student heyday!”
They both looked around them and shuddered at the memory. Every weekend, bodies had littered the floor, students sleeping where they’d dropped after a night of partying and drinking.
“Toby and I have discussed this. We don’t want you to move out because you feel you have to. We love having you here. Skylar is part of our lives, too. We love her; we love you.”
Star rubbed at her eyes, swallowing hard at the lump that had formed in her throat. “Love you both, too,” she said, pulling Laura into a bear hug.
Laura pulled back, resting her hand on Star’s cheek. “You need to live, hon. This is not healthy. Life can’t only be about work and Skylar. Star Roberts is a person with needs. Please talk to your mum – think of it as a favour to me.” She stepped back, resting her hand on her stomach. “Think about me, too. This is going to be the last celebration I can partake in for the foreseeable future. Once I start to waddle, we won’t be going very far. Not to mention after the baby arrives.” She gave Star a pointed stare. “I’ve seen first-hand what that does to someone’s social life.”
Giving her friend a half-smile, Star nodded in agreement, then moved away to continue tidying the remaining pieces away. She knew Laura meant well, but the thought of adding another complication to her life filled her with horror. Looking up, Star caught Laura’s glare. “Okay, I’ll ask,” she said, before the yell of “Ready” took her attention to upstairs.
Star motioned to the stairs as if proving her point.
“I’ll get the hot chocolates ready for your return,” Laura said.
“Marshmallows are in the cupboard. I bought a new packet,” Star said over her shoulder as she headed up the stairs to Skylar.
∞∞∞
Star dropped onto the sofa opposite her friend, and leant her head against its back, before closing her eyes. Taking a deep breath, the tension of the day slowly ebbed away. Opening her eyes, she grinned at Laura and grabbed a steaming cup of hot chocolate from the table, raising a toast towards the neatly piled cardboard. “To the Tudor House and The Great Fire of London Project!” she said, before tipping her cup towards Laura and adding, “and an amazing friend who helps me out whenever I need her.”
Laura added her mug to the salute, clinking it against Star’s before taking a sip and adding, “To reinforced cardboard! A parents’ nightmare, a teacher’s secret weapon!” Both women spluttered, before Laura continued, “And to my best friend, who needs to realise she’s not in this alone!”
Star remained silent for a moment, staring at her hot chocolate. “I’ll speak to Mum and Dad in the morning. Maybe they can take Skylar for a weekend. It would be nice to have a night out.”
“Mine, or Toby’s parents are always happy to babysit,” Laura said. “They love Skylar. Plus, they are both desperate to come down and help plan out the nursery.”
Star’s belly knotted. Her own parents’ lack of support and love for Skylar was renowned. Laura and Toby’s parents had spent more time with Skylar than her own, which was not surprising, as Toby’s father had been the one to arrange Skylar’s adoption. Star had spent a lot of time with Ian Grant QC, as she navigated her way through the legal process of becoming a new parent.
“I’m sure my parents would be happy to babysit,” Star said unconvincingly. She had never fathomed how her mother could turn her back on her only grandchild, when Skylar was the only part of her dead daughter left.
“Don’t worry, we’ll sort something out,” Laura said, having noticed her friend’s shoulders dropping. “This is not what Lily wanted for you. She would not have wanted you to put your life on hold.”
“Maybe not, but it wasn’t what Lily wanted for herself either,” Star said, trying hard not to snap at Laura. “Lily would love to be here raising her daughter. Being her mother. Loving her.” She squeezed her eyes shut as memories of the short time her sister had had with Skylar flooded her brain. Even now, six years on, the pain was almost overwhelming.
“That is not what I’m saying,” Laura said carefully. “You can have a life, child, and career. Even if you don’t think you can. You just need to let us help.”
Star wrapped her arms around herself, a deep chill settling in her bones. It always did when she thought about her sister. “She entrusted me, Laura.” Star whispered. “They only had three weeks together. So I’ll go to school plays, build cardboard houses, and be here for Skylar, in every way my sister can’t. I’ll be everything our own mum wasn’t to Lily and me. Everything Lily would have been, because instead of Skylar having her mum, that beautiful little girl got me!”
Laura had sat forwards. “I know, hon, and life sucks! But you are not a poor substitute for your sister,” she said, shaking her head. “You are an amazing mum and Skylar adores you.” Laura’s voice caught as the conversation headed down a path they usually tried to avoid. “That little girl loves you and wants for nothing. Stop being hard on yourself. No one is perfect.” Before Star could interrupt, Laura raised her hand. “I’m not perfect. No one is. I’m about to be a mum, but it won’t stop me. I will make mistakes, but I’ll learn and I will love. That’s one thing you’ve shown me – love gets you through even the darkest of times. Love surrounds Skylar, and Lily would be so proud of you.”
Star rubbed her chest as the pressure built.
Laura shrugged and gave Star a watery smile. “Watching you try to live up to the ghost of your sister is more than I can take in my condition.”
Star moved next to her friend, placing her arms around her.
“Laura’s right,” a voice said from the doorway.
Star jumped. She’d been unaware of Toby’s arrival or that he had heard their discussion. Toby crossed the room, dropping a kiss on his wife’s lips, before wiping her tears away with the pad of his thumb.
“Stop doubting yourself,” he said, his attention returning to Star. “You’ve come home after a long night and a full day and started building a school project. How many parents do that!” Star’s eyes widened. When had Skylar spoken to Toby? He smiled, as if reading her mind. “My little squidge told me while I was waiting at the station this morning. You, my friend, are her hero – not just her mum. She loves you with every ounce of her being. I just wish you’d stop comparing yourself to a ghost.” Toby leant down, pulling Star into a hug, and whispered in her ear, “By the way, four am finishes are not healthy!”
Star felt her body relax once more and returned his hug. “I’m a tired, emotional wreck! But the presentation is done, which allowed me time to play with cardboard! I’m just waiting on one of the team members to deliver their part.”
“I take it you mean Jackson. Is he still being an asshole?” Toby had perched himself on the sofa arm.
“He’s made it quite clear he wants me to fail. But I’m not giving him the satisfaction. Today in our meeting he went very quiet after he realised his non-delivery yesterday hadn’t stopped me.”