I start to get an inkling of what he might have been talking about. I have to do something about this, if that's the case. I need to get a hold of Bella and claim what's mine.
In fact, that's what I'm determined to do. There's only one way that I know of for how to do that, though.
I drive back to my house and open my computer. Then I log into Facebook and type in Janice's name. I find her profile quickly and send her a message. This will be a long shot but it's probably the only way that I can reach Bella.
Now it's more important than ever before that I get a hold of her and see her and try to talk to her again.
I get up and pace around the kitchen as I nervously wait for a response from Janice. My mind is no longer on the fight that I had with Derek. More than ever, it’s fixated on Bella.
It was probably a mistake to try and forget about her— not that I was successful in doing that, anyway. Yes, my career has been a success so far but what is that if I can’t have the person I love and care about the most in my life?
I stop pacing and walk back over to my computer. A little message icon is flashing on the screen.
I take a deep breath as I click open the conversation from Janice and read through everything. I know now more than ever what I have to do. I must find some way to get Bella to meet with me.
I quickly type a response to Janice, asking how I can reach Bella.
Later that night, I lay in bed and think about my entire conversation. It has taken a lot of convincing, but I think Janice might be willing to try and help me contact Bella.
It's going to take some time, though. Thank goodness that I have time off from the game now that the season is over.
I think about not only what could be happening between Bella and me but also about what’s been going on between Derek and me. Maybe it's better to get all this out in the open, so that way everybody knows everything.
I mean, it seems like my friendship with him is pretty damaged,anyway.
What more could a revelation of our night together do to it?
At the same time, I wonder if there's any way to repair it?
I should look into that after I work on my reconciliation with Bella.
Eventually my thoughts wear me down and I fall asleep. I dream of Bella and of being able to see her again.
The next morning, I wake up with her still on my mind. I spring out of bed to see if there’s any more news from Janice, and I feel more determined than ever to have Bella back in my arms again.
And our baby in my arms for the first time.
Chapter 15 – Bella
My daughter and I are now home from the hospital and we’re at Janice's parents’vacation home.It’s Valentine’s Day but Janice and I aren’t doing much to celebrate, considering that we’re both single.
Shedidmake me some heart-shaped pancakes this morning, though. Good old Janice always goes above and beyond to make me happy.
I’m sitting in the guest bedroom, having just finished nursing my daughter. I sit on the edge of the bed and rock her back and forth in my arms, humming softly as I do so.
I’m pretty sure she’s sound asleep, but I hold her a few minutes longer just to make sure. Then I lay her gently in her crib and quietly leave the room.
I walk back out into the living room, hoping that I'll be able to have a few minutes to myself. The baby hasn’t been great about staying asleep right away yet. I wonder if she'll wake back up in a few minutes wanting to be fed again before actually going to sleep for good.
It's sort of a crazy schedule that we're on, but I've been told by everyone, including several nurses and doctors I spoke to at the hospital, that this is a normal problem for a newborn baby to have. I just have to wait it out until she grows up a bit more and is able to soothe herself better.
I can hear Janice in the kitchen, most likely fixing herself something to eat. I'm about to sit down on the couch when I hear a knock at the front door.
That's weird since we're not expecting anyone, I think.Maybe it's Janice's parents.
Janice hears the knock too and comes out of the kitchen. I look at her and can tell that sheisexpecting someone— but she just hadn’t told me, for some reason.
"Who might that be?" I ask in confusion.