I saw a little blond boy running around my mother’s forest, a tiny Silas. The kid has better style than Silas, because he’d be my son, too. He’d transform into a unicorn, just like his father, and play hide-and-seek with Fernando.
I saw Friendsgiving dinner in our little corner of Eats in Piccadilly, where Imogen, and Wendy Ariti, and Rosemary DeLaCrux, and even the library receptionist Madison joined us in a meal filled with joy and laughter.
Every iteration of my future included Silas. He was the most frustrating man I’d ever met, and I loved him more than I’d ever loved anyone or anything.
I needed him.
I would die for him.
My arms and legs trembled. I’d never been so afraid in my life.
I dove over Silas’s chest, putting myself in the line of fire. It had to work. This had to be enough. I had to save him.
My chest clenched. I couldn’t breathe, knowing what was coming. My body shuttered.
The lightning struck with a zap and enough heat to melt steel. Electricity rippled through my limbs. Tears poured from my eyes. I’d never felt such pain, never felt so ready for it to end.
My heart stopped. My world went black.
This was the moment I’d been terrified to face, the circumstance my body had shut down to avoid, and here I was throwing myself straight at the end I so feared without hesitation. Time seemed to stand still as my brain screamed for my body to flee, to try to bargain my way out of the demise that was sure to come.
Instead, I died.
In the void of nothingness, the pain stopped. My mind wandered to the best moments of my life—finding Fernando on the beach, tea with my mother, Silas—so many moments, good and bad, each one special in its own way. Fear faded. I’d done everything I could do, and now it was over. I’d earned this contented rest.
A bright light filled my eyes. Was this what waited for me in the afterlife? I’d wait there for those I loved, reunited with friends who had already passed. Was this—
Sensation returned—burning, flaming, feeling.
It was agonizing and wonderful at the same time. Pain was life.
My body rose into the air, and fire engulfed me as I was reborn.
I was cold and hot and blind and all-seeing.
I was alive.
As my body lowered back to the floor, only one thought that filled my head: all that mattered was Silas. Was he all right? Had I saved him?
He wasn’t moving.
As the fire engulfing me went out, I wrapped my arms around Silas’s middle. His black horsey coat was soft. His chest was so wide I couldn’t reach around him. He was warm, and aside from a few cuts, he appeared unharmed. His chest rose and fell.
He was alive.
Happy tears bubbled out of me. “I love you. I’m sorry I didn’t get here sooner.”
He bucked a bit and whinnied under me.
“Fiddlesticks,” a deep voice said.
I whipped around just in time to see the orb slip out of Kurnbottom’s hands. It crashed to the ground and shattered into a thousand tiny shards of glowing glass.
I’d screwed up, royally. I’d let myself get so distracted by my reunion with Silas, I’d forgotten about the villain who’d nearly murdered us both.
I shot up to my feet and pointed a finger at him. “Submit, fiend, in the name of the library.”
Kurnbottom threw his hands in the air. “Totally. Take me away.”