That’s… That’s it? He’s going to tell me to meet him for dinner and leave? I should tell him to fuck off. I should tell him if he wants to go to dinner with me, he’ll have to pick me up. I should tell him—
But before I get up the nerve to do anything, he’s driven away, leaving me alone in the rain with my broken library and wilted roses.
3
Rosalina
Hundredsofbeastlyeyesstare at me. And only half of them are mounted on the wall.
The Poussin Hunting Lodge is packed.How many people did Lucas invite?It’s not just dinner with me; he’s thrown a party for the whole town.
My oversized scarf, white shirt, and black leggings are underdressed compared to everyone’s fancy attire. I awkwardly try to disappear into the crowd. Warmth from the large stone fireplace thaws my cold cheeks. The faint whiff of liquor and tobacco mixes with the tables full of steaming meat and pumpkin pie.
Lucas’s family has owned the Hunting Lodge for generations. Part inn, part pub, part guide service. A high-beamed ceiling supports antique chandeliers, each bearing a lantern that casts the room in orangey light. Tables, chairs, benches, and the bar are all carved from dark wood. Autumn leaves and foliage decorate the hearth.
The heads of elk and deer and pelts of bears, mountain lions, and a wolf are mounted on the walls. Lucas killed the wolf nearly ten years ago. Told me he shot it in the back of its head while it was sleeping. Its fur is still soft and dense, almost shimmering in the firelight.
Tension gnaws in my gut, and I force myself to look away. There are so many people.A welcome home party he forgot to mention?
The whole town is here, but of course no one tries to start a conversation with me. I spy a lot of Lucas’s family, even the ones from nearby towns. Cousins, aunts, uncles, grandparents.All I’ve got is Papa, and that’s only half the time.
Lucas’s parents have always been kind to me. But even they join in the town gossip about the crazy O’Connells. “At least you’ll have lovely grandchildren,” had been a condolence I’d heard directed toward Mr. and Mrs. Poussin many times.
They don’t have to worry, though. Lucas made it very clear he didn’t want a future when he dumped me before he left for university. I’m just his hometown hook-up now.
Finally, I spot Lucas looking down over the railing from the upper level. I weave through the crowd and rush up the stairs to him.
Lucas pulls me into a hug. An intense wave of relief rushes over my body, and I exhale between his muscular arms before he lets me go. He takes my chin and makes me look up at him. “Saw you come in. You looked positively frazzled.”
Well, it would have been nice to know there would be so many people,I think.
Lucas drops his hand. “You would have never made it in the city. It’s refreshing to remember how innocent my little pumpkin is.”
“Don’t call me that.” I hate that nickname.
“I’ll get you a job at the front desk here. It’ll do you some good to see people from all walks of life.”
“I see different people at the bookstore,” I remind him.
“What, women and moldy oldies?” Lucas laughs. Then he grips me around the waist and pulls me against his broad chest. “I’m talking about real people. People who have seen the world.”
“I’ve been to many places too,” I say. “Well, I’ve read about them.”
“My little pumpkin.” He shakes his head, giving me a pitying look as his hand trails down my arm. His thumb brushes my left wrist.
“Wait—”
He pulls up my sleeve and blinks down at my arm.
“Oh right,” he says. “I should have remembered you’d never be able to forget me.”
He’d forgotten?
He’d forgotten.
He’d forgotten the tears that streamed down my cheeks eight years ago as I dry heaved and barely been able to breathe. He was never there when I needed him. And he was going to leave for university. Pain had clawed inside me like a caged animal. And no matter how many tears I’d cried, not a single one reached him.
I remember that night.