My whole body has gone still remembering the feel of his arms around me. My body is not my own, lost to the cold and wet, and lost to him.
“He pushed himself onto the ice, never once letting go of my jacket, or letting me sink back down. Then he pulled me out of the water, all by himself. I collapsed on top of him, coughing, and when I opened my eyes, all I could see was a boy with hair bright as the sunset.
“He said, ‘Who are you? How have I never seen you before?’ The other kids covered us in their jackets and tried to keep us warm until the paramedics showed up. We were whisked away in an ambulance, and I was shivering so bad. But he sat beside me, threw his arm around me, and told me I was safe now, that he’d look after me. His name was Lucas.”
I turn to Kel, wondering if he’s even interested. He’s just watching me. His eyes narrow. “Go on, Rosalina. I want to know about your life, as hard as it is for me to hear about you in pain.”
“I don’t think I’ve ever told anyone this story,” I mumble. “I don’t know why. It’s something everyone in the town already knew.”
“But they never heard it from you,” Keldarion says.
I nod, tugging the blanket tighter around my shoulders. “My father was too far away to get me from the hospital. Actually, they couldn’t even get in contact with him for three days. But Lucas’s family insisted I come home with them. They lived in the inn, and they gave me an entire room of my own. At the time, I don’t think I’d had a better week in my life. It was nothing but hot soup and warm fires. Lucas and I spent every day binging reality TV. It didn’t feel weird at all. He kept going on about how he couldn’t believe we’d never met before. I knew who he was, of course. Everyone in town knew Lucas. Orca Cove’s golden boy, perfect and handsome—”
A low grumble echoes from Keldarion, and I can’t help but give a little laugh.
“When we went back to school, everyone treated him like a hero who had slayed a dragon, and I was the princess he rescued. The school even had a whole assembly on ice safety and the police came to give him a medal. If Lucas had been popular before, he was revered now.”
The firelight plays over my pale skin and Keldarion’s white fur.
“After that, it was like everyonesawme. Girls would tell me they liked my scrunchie, or how beautiful I looked.”
“You are beautiful, Rosalina,” Keldarion says.
“Maybe that was all they could think to say to me. It felt like the more they saw me… the less of me that was left. I didn’t talk about the things I liked, and I did fewer things I enjoyed. Lucas was the sun, and I was his shadow. And I was so good at it, he forgot he had his own. But I was terrified of being alone. And being a shadow next to someone… Well, wasn’t that better than being by myself?”
An angry rumble sounds through Keldarion, and he curls closer. I bring the blanket up, disappearing into his warmth.
“What about here? Do you pretend?”
“No.” I laugh. “I mean, why would I? I have nothing to lose. A prisoner—”
“I told you. You’re not a prisoner.”
I nod, remembering his words at the ball. “After the ice skating, it was fate, I suppose. I owed Lucas my life and—”
“Saving someone’s life does not grant them ownership of it.”
His words settle in me before I continue, “He was my hero, and I was his…”
“Do you love him?”
My fingers tighten around my wrist until it hurts. “I always thought so. I mean, yes. In a way. I wonder sometimes… is all love good?”
Kel’s breath is heavy, and his whole body shifts before he says, “No.”
Tears fall from my eyes, and I wipe them with the back of my hand. “Don’t be thinking about yourself now, okay? This is my pity party. Your mate is going to be very lucky when you find her.” The last words are a struggle, feeling all wrong in my mouth.
“I told you before, Rosalina. I will never have a mate.”
I could tell him off like I did at the ball, but my strength has waned. “You’ll fall in love again, Kel,” I whisper. “It’s not hard, actually.”
My eyes flutter closed, and I let the warmth of the fire settle over me as I drift into a deep sleep. It’s not hard to fall in love again, because somehow, it happened to me.
The frost and darkness do not enter my dreams. There’s only warmth. The star that led me to him blooms in my chest, sending a cascade of contentment through me. Images float by: softly falling snow, a boy roasting chestnuts and stringing orange slices above a mantel. I see Kel, younger, with a sweet smile. An older fae runs her hands through his hair, kissing his cheek. Now, there’s a field of flowers and he’s sticking them between the metal plates of another small boy’s armor, laughing. A young Ezryn, I know it.
My dreams feel like memories not of my own, but the best kind, the kind that stays locked within the heart. Dark satin sheets strain beneath Kel’s large, veined hands. A desperate kiss sends heat coiling to my core, and his raspy voice fills my head: “There is nothing in this world I would not give up for you, no sacrifice I would not make.” Passion and lust fill every part of my body, and distantly I feel the coarse blanket against my bare skin. “Then prove it, Kel. Prove it to me.”
The band around my wrist burns, and I descend further into this dream. Into this memory. A rain-splattered night. The face of a beautiful human woman, four roses in her hands. Then, a light, a light so bright I can’t see. The Enchantress flashes before my eyes, her face one of unearthly beauty, a face I’ve seen before.