Hmm.
Stelios has his phone open on his web browser, and a smile wobbles to my lips. It feels like ages ago since I clicked on this article.
"Are you really buying this?" I ask teasingly. "Sex positions and pregnancy?"
"It wouldn't hurt to be thorough," Stelios counters with a shrug, "and that's why I think we should try #3."
Huh?
My gaze rapidly skim the rest of the article until I finally reach #3.
The wheelbarrow?
I click on the link for a GIF tutorial, and my eyes widen when I finally realize what this 'position' is all about.
Holy!
Craaaaap!
I try to make a run for it, but it's too late.
His fingers catch my wrist as he forces me to spin back to face him. "Where do you think you're going, wife?"
I don't even have a chance to answer, with my husband already swiftly tearing my clothes off.
"Stelios, no!"
It feels terrifying and terribly exciting at the same time when I eventually find myself naked while my husband remains fully clothed.
Oh God.
I can feel myself shaking and getting wet between my legs as I watch him unzip himself and his engorged shaft jut out through the gap.
"Stelios, s-stop—-"
But my husband is deaf to my pleas, and the next thing I know he already has me upside-down.
Oh God!
My hands hit the floor as he pulls my legs up like they're handles for a wheelbarrow.
"Stelios!"
I end up screaming his name as he thrusts into me from behind.
"Do you like how I'm fucking you, wife?"
Oh God.
"Do you?"
He thrusts back into me after speaking, and all I can do is whimper as I cling to him.
"Answer me," Stelios growls. "Do you like how I'm fucking you?"
He pounds back into me so, so hard that I start seeing stars as I finally sob out what he deserves to hear.
"Yes!"
"And do you think this position can help you get pregnant?"
"Oh God, yes."
"Then tell me you want me to knock you up—-"
He starts thrusting harder and faster, and the words simply tumble out.
"Knock me up," I cry out. "Please knock me up, husband, please—-"
Stelios slams back into me harder than ever, and just as lightning strikes twice as orgasm hits both of us at the same time, it's also at that moment my husbands say the words I was prepared to wait for another lifetime to hear.
"I love you, wife."
Epilogue
"Say cheese!"
"Cheese," my husband says obediently in his tux, and in a tone so dry I can't help but laugh.
Stelios looks at me curiously when I upload his photo straight away to my socials.
"Can you finally tell me who you're trying to piss?"
"Only when you finally promise not to interfere."
"You do remember who you're talking to, don't you?"
"The world's hottest husband?"
Stelios shakes his head. "You're talking to someone who can be so dangerously obsessive his doctor believes the wrong provocation can turn him into a cold-blooded killer...but you're right, I do happen to be the world's hottest husband as well."
"Can't you just be obsessed with me," I bargain, "and forget about the rest of the world?"
"It's because I'm obsessed with you that I need the truth." Stelios arches a brow. "Last chance, wife. Do you want to tell me yourself or would you like me to find out on my own?"
"Okay, fine. There was this girl in my high school who always made fun of me and predicting that I'd end up married to a loser." I wrinkle my nose at him. "All of the photos I've been uploading are basically me being very petty—-"
I can only roll my eyes when Stelios nods approvingly.
"A good start," he says, "but it's not enough. How about letting me teach that girl a lesson—-"
Since his lessons tend to get really bloody, there's only one way to resolve this.
"Oh, look!" I point in relief to Sheena's wedding coordinator, who's just come out of the garden chapel looking rather frantic. "I think that's our cue to get ready."
And so it is, and ten minutes later Stelios and I are walking down the aisle as bridesmaid and groomsman for our friends' wedding.
"This is so embarrassing," I whisper under my breath. "I'm the only one pregnant in her entire entourage—-"
"What's there to be embarrassed about?" Stelios looks at me blankly. "I've never seen you look more beautiful or sexier—-"
"Because you're a perv," I retort laughingly with a roll of my eyes. "I'm five months pregnant, Stelios. That means I'm more huge than hot—-"
"And lactating."
Stelios' tone is filled with so much satisfaction it takes me an extra moment to understand what he's saying.
What?!
Horror fills my gaze when I look down, and I realize what my husband has said is true.
Oh God, I really am lactating!
My bouquet of daisies and sunflowers become an impromptu cover for the wet dark spot on my gown, and as soon as we hear the priest declare our friends husband and wife, Stelios doesn't waste a second longer as he swiftly drags me inside the caretaker's apartment at the back of the chapel.