Not really.
I love him too much for that. I love them all—the men who saved me.
The time before that when I was part of a “lesson” was Guido’s sick form of retribution. But he was teaching my father, not me. My father, who had crossed Romano at the wrong time, was forced to watch me have my arm hacked off my body.
I was twenty at the time and pissing-my-pants terrified. I passed out before the knife hit the bone, and I woke up in a pool of my own blood. I was supposed to die, but instead, my arm was wrapped in a tourniquet, and I was in the back of an SUV.
The rest of the story is hazy. My father left me to die, and Kane picked me up. I fully expected them to finish the job, but instead, Kane had his doctor patch me up. When I could think again without the pain consuming my every thought, he made me an offer. A chance to get retribution for a lifetime of loyalty.
In the end, it was the easiest decision I have ever made.
Of course, I didn’t expect Kane to be anything other than lord and master at the time. He was sort of a dark, brooding figure, and he didn’t stick around long enough for me to ask him why he kept me. I’m not sure when it changed or why, but one night, he showed up in my room after a long day of tracking down a list of informants he wanted brought in, and he kissed me.
I remember being too stunned to kiss back until he started to pull away, and then I reached for him—my hand and my stump—and something between us shattered.
He fucked me into oblivion, then kept me in his bed and told me this was my forever if I wanted it. Now I can’t imagine my life any other way. Kane, Ari, Phoenix, and me.
The Misfit Toys, Ari likes to call us. He speaks with his hands, but louder than any of us could ever hope to be. His story is a lot like mine, only he was young, and he was tortured so long that there was no real coming back for him. He might not be a proper sociopath, but he’s close enough. He loves three people on this earth, and all three of them live under our roof.
The rest of the world can burn for all he cares, and while that should probably scare me as a man with some semblance of conscience left, instead, it just makes me want to raw him until he can’t think about anything else, ever again.
Things feel strange now, though. We’ve been watching the Romano daughter—the only surviving member of Guido’s direct line that’s left—for almost two years, and I’m starting to see flaws in Kane’s plan.
Alice is well protected, but in the time we’ve been stalking her, Guido has never once come to call.
Her birthdays always come with a delivery of some paltry little gift, and she’s been visited by her cousins once or twice, but her father has never shown his face.
And Phoenix, who managed to get a hack on her phone and her laptop, says Guido has never called. Any communication is done through his PA, so while Guido might be willing to protect her, I’m not sure he’ll feel a damn thing when Kane takes her out.
Her situation reminds me of Phoenix’s more than I want to admit.
She might be allowed out, but she’s still kept under glass, and it’s obvious she has no idea how to interact with the world around her. But she’s also strong like him. She’s resilient, and she’s brave. Even tonight, when I very obviously scared the shit out of her, she still held her ground. Then she obeyed like a good little girl, andJesus, that got me going more than I expected it to.
I’ve still got half a chub from holding back the chase I wanted to give when she ran, but I know there’s no chance of being sated. At least, not by her. Kane is God, and his orders will not be defied.
Alice is not to be touched.
“Are you finished?” Kane asks gruffly at my continued silence.
I roll my eyes and quickly cross the room, taking his scotch out of his hand and setting it on the table. I shove one knee between his thighs as he leans against the edge of the mahogany, and then I rub the heel of my palm over his dick. He’s soft, which pisses me off a bit, but I cease to care when he takes me by the chin and kisses me sharp and biting and cruel.
“Not tonight,” he says when he breaks away, and the tendon in my jaw tics. “Go find Ari.”
I scoff, even as I step away, and I’m annoyed that Kane lets me put distance between us. The truth is, just like all the other misfits here, I crave his attention. I crave to be important in his eyes. And while he never lets us forget that we’re his, there are pieces he holds back, and we can all feel them like giant chasms made up of empty void.
“He’s got a new toy,” I say, running my hand around my mouth.
Kane shrugs. “He’ll be finished with it soon enough.”
I suppose that’s reason enough to wait. Ariel always gets worked up when he’s making someone sorry for existing, and it’s probably the best sex I ever have. I lean forward, and Kane indulges me in a last kiss before I turn and walk out, taking the familiar turns and twists of the hallways until I hit the door to the wind tunnel that connects both buildings.
Ari’s playroom isn’t part of the house. It’s a steel-reinforced building with more insulation than anyone can fathom. The only reason we even hear the screams is because Phoenix set up an intercom in the house and often plays us the symphony of pain. It gets Ari off knowing that we can hear him work, but since it’s dead silent tonight, that means Ari either finished too early, or Phoenix is sleeping off one of his migraines.
I debate going to check on our beast.
He’s the most wrecked out of all of us, but Phoenix also brought it on himself. He grew up in the home with Kane, learning everything from Kane’s father. He became a tech genius before he hit puberty, and his skills only got better as he aged.
I only know the stories secondhand since Phoenix had long since been trapped in this house by the time I came along. Phoenix never likes to talk about it, but once or twice—when he was deep in a bottle of scotch—he let himself be vulnerable with me and told me what happened.