I found myself spilling now, unable to stop. “You have no idea!” My thoughts wandered back to last week. I bit my lip as I felt myself sinking into the memory. “Heath is amazing, I can tell he has some experience pleasuring a woman. The things he did with his tongue, oh.” I closed my eyes and leaned back against the couch, having vivid flashbacks.
Visions of being between them, Reid touching me before holding me still while Heath devoured me. “And I mean, Reid. God, he’s just as good at playing me like a finely tuned instrument. I can’t help but think it would be fantastic to be betw—”
Jill’s sharp gasp brought me back to reality. I slapped my hand over my mouth when I realized what I’d said. I winced and looked at Jill. Maybe she didn’t hear me.
Her eyes were huge, and her mouth hung open.Shit! Shit! Shit! What do I say now?“Oh, fuck,” I said behind my hand. “Jill, don’t freak out.”
I heard Lindsey as she came back out of the dressing room. I jerked back and looked at her with a little panic in my eyes.
“I like this dress, Mom. I think it brings out the color of my eyes. What do you think?” she asked with a sweet smile.
Without even thinking about how the dress looked, I nodded maybe a little too quickly and cleared my throat. “Yes, sweetie, that dress is really pretty. Go show me another one,” I said with what I hoped was an encouraging smile.
Lindsey looked at me and then Jill, squinting her eyes. “Is she okay?” She pointed at Jill.
Jill was still open-mouthed, staring at me and clearly in shock. I smacked her lightly on the leg to snap her out of it.
She shook her head and looked over at my girl. “Y-yes, I’m fine, Lyns. Your mom just told me something I hadn’t been expecting. Go on and try on the next one.”
Lindsey looked between the both of us suspiciously and walked back to the dressing room. As soon as she shut the door, Jill snapped her head back to me so fast I was sure she got whiplash. Before I could say anything, she punched me in the shoulder.
“Ouch!” I exclaimed, rubbing the offended arm.
“You bitch! Why didn’t you tell me you were shacking up with two different guys? I’m trying not to let it hurt my feelings that you didn’t feel the need to share with me, Kate!” Anger was plain in her voice.
“I’m not shacking up with anyone. There was only one incident with both of them in the elevator last week, I swear.” I winced again. “Well, that and the time with just Reid at their apartment. But that was it!” I tried to reply more calmly than I felt.
I knew immediately that I fucked up again when Jill jerked back from me and screeched. “Both of them!”
I slapped my hand across her mouth, practically climbing on top of her in the process. “Shhhh!” I hushed her. I looked back at the dressing room, thanking God that Lindsey wasn’t standing there.
Jill shook me off and gapped at me. “What do you mean by both of them? Like both of them at separate times or…”
I rubbed my hands across my face and mumbled my answer. “Like, together…” I braced myself, expecting her to whoop and holler, alerting the whole store to my almost threesome.
To my surprise, she was quiet, smiling at me. Giggling, she pushed my shoulder and said, “You lucky slut!”
I flinched in surprise. “You don’t think it’s weird? They took me to the beach last Saturday where they told me that they wanted to share me, like, at the same time, monogamously. I didn’t even know those types of relationships were a thing.”
She calmed her voice when she spoke this time. “Why would I think it’s weird? Girl, you have been living in the dark ages with Tom for far too long. That type of relationship isn’t as uncommon as you think. People are a lot more accepting of those types of kinks these days, babe. If Reid is half as hot as Heath and you don’t want them, then send them my way,” she said with a sultry smile.
I couldn’t help the laugh that escaped. Leave it up to her to make a joke. “And you called me a slut?” I teased.
She relaxed back on the couch. Grinning at me, she replied, “I’m not going to apologize for liking sex, and neither should you. It’s past time you start letting yourself feel the finer things in life. Mainly, feeling what it would be like between those two.” She winked at me.
I sighed heavily, feeling relief run through my body. I hadn’t realized how much I’d needed to talk to her about this. It was stupid of me to try to keep her out of this. She was my rock, and I felt ashamed trying to keep a secret from her.
Someone cleared their throat in front of us. I snapped my head in the direction to find Lindsey staring at us. We had been so consumed by our talk that I didn’t even know how long she had been standing there. “Shit, how long have you been here, Lyns?” I started to stand.
“Long enough to hear that you have a couple of love interests,” she said with a small smile.
This was not happening to me. I stepped toward my daughter and grabbed her shoulders. “I’m so sorry, honey. You weren’t supposed to hear any of that. Do you want to talk about it? I know I haven’t been with anyone other than your father, and I don’t want you to think that I didn’t respect what we had.” I grimaced. This was so awkward. “If you aren’t ready for me to date, then you can tell me and I won’t cross that line,” I promised.
I couldn’t fault her if she didn’t like the idea of me being with someone other than her father. Even though she was all grown up, I would never intentionally make her uncomfortable.
Lindsey surprised me by laughing. “Fuck Dad. He was such a shit to you, Mom. You literally did everything for him and he repaid you by sleeping withVivian.” She said her name like it left a bad taste in her mouth. She looked at me seriously. “I would never tell you not to date. I want you to be happy, and you deserve someone to treat you like you’re precious for a change”—she paused—“or multiple someones.”
She gave me an encouraging smile, and I let her words sink in.