And knowing she’ll still be in my arms when I wake up is all I need.
She’s all I’ll ever need from now on.
CHAPTER NINETEEN
Mack
Before I open my eyes again, my arm asleep with Tina hugging it. Both of us in the same position we fell asleep in.
I smile to myself.
Knowing that she’s mine. And knowing that I’d make old Foxx Macintyre look poor with the riches I’ve found with Tina.
I let my lids creep open, moving my gaze over her curves under the blanket as she shifts and mews in her sleep.
The same smile still glued to her lips, set exactly the same all night.
And to her, it probably is still night.
For me, four thirty a.m. starts are a part of life.
Us country folk don’t just go to bed early for the hell of it. We go to bed early because we have to get up while it’s still dark.
Old habits will die hard, but with Tina under the covers with me, it only makes it all the harder to get moving.
To get up and check the horses. To do everything a day on the ranch needs doing, whether I want to stay bunched up with Tina or not.
Sliding my arm out from under her, and kissing her still flushed cheek, I tiptoe out of the bedroom, already missing her warmth as I pull my clothes on.
Already to set to work to make sure she has a proper breakfast waiting when she does wake up.
Skipping dinner last night wasn’t my plan for her, but everything else has kind of made up for that.
I’d starve myself for a month if I knew it was her waiting for me at the end of it.
But before any of that, I hear the familiar sounds of the ranch.
The first songbirds, bold enough to sing in the faint pre-dawn light.
And the muffled sounds of hooves on soft dirt. The snorting neighs of the mares outside in the corral.
Reminding me too that I didn’t give them any extra attention last night.
Something I’m sure they’ll forgive me for, given all that’s happened in one day.
Trying to creep outside without waking Tina, the old place sounds like a symphony of nothing but noise as I make my way out.
The creaking boards and groans of the heavy iron hinges on the front door, to the squeal of the rusty latch as I let myself through to say good morning to the mares.
But Tina doesn’t stir, and after the horses give me a good going over, sniffing and head-butting their way through my silent story as they read it in their own special way, I feel the heaviness coming back.
Knowing that I’m supposed to pack all the gear up and load it back onto the saddles.
To hitch them to the horses, ride back down the hillside, and then what?
Just watch her drive away?
No.
I can’t see that happening.
So why the sudden doom and gloom? Why does it feel like our first day together could well be our last?
Ruby picks up on my mood and nuzzles my neck with her nose.
It’s cold, and wet. And as much as I could try and tell myself she’s consoling me somehow, I know she’s just waiting for her oats, same as Lucy.
Almost mechanically, I watch myself feeding them and checking them over.
Heading back to the cabin once I feel my own belly groaning with hunger. And almost jumping out of my skin when I creep back inside as quietly as I can.
Tina is suddenly in front of me, wearing nothing but one of my shirts. Her mouth wide as she yawns silently. Her hair all bunched up, and her eyes still dreamy with sleep.
“I woke up, and you weren’t there,” she murmurs.
And I’ve never been so glad to hold her close, instantly feeling whole again once she’s in my arms.
But it only intensifies my dread at the idea she could still be leaving today.
She becomes more alert when she picks up on my mood.
Suddenly wide awake herself once she reads the look in my eyes.
That conversation we never wanted to have is already hanging thick in the air between us without us saying a single word.
Both of us knowing that we each have something that wants to take the other away from us.
For me, it’s the ranch. The endless work, and the simple fact I’m not supposed to get friendly with the guests.
For Tina, it’s her mom.
The one person she’s relied on her whole life to provide for her.
The one who’s expecting to take her home in just a few hours’ time.
I want to tell her she’s not going anywhere. That everything I said was and is still true. She’s mine now, and she’s going to have our baby.
And feeling my mouth open to say it, I watch her eyes widen as she leans forward. As if she’s waiting for me to say the only thing either of us wants to hear right now.