“It sort of feels like you and me. Not like something that someone thought would look good in a glossy magazine spread that features celebrity holiday homes.”
He laughed and pulled her into his arms, kissing her. “Definitely not. I mean, I do like fresh, modern decor and my houses do suit my personality, but this is much homier.”
“Like me,” she said quietly.
“Yeah, just like you.”
He turned her in his arms and tipped up her chin with his finger under it. “You are a blend of so many different things that make you unique.”
She flushed at the compliment. “I wouldn’t change anything about you, either.”
“Liar,” he said, not unkindly.
“Okay, well, you’re right. I wish you weren’t so famous, but at the same time, I know you wouldn’t be the man you are without it.”
He leaned back, holding her by her waist. “Very wise.”
“I know,” she said, tossing her hair. “I think I could keep the magi company and hold my own. Let me grab a blanket to put under the tree.”
Paisley dashed into her bedroom and into the closet where she had the box of childhood things her mom had sent her a few years ago. She’d still been mad at her family back then, so she’d shoved it back here. Sighing, she opened the lid and the scents of pine and oranges assailed her. She closed her eyes for a minute, letting the memories flow through her. She didn’t want the past to interfere with the present, but she knew the past was always right there.
“Need a hand?”
She turned to see Sean standing in the doorway. “Nah.”
She shifted aside homemade chains made of red and green construction paper and found the blanket.
“Here it is.”
“I like this too,” he said, reaching around her and taking the paper chain. “Can we put this on the tree?”
She thought for a minute. All these years pretending the past was only something she had to make up for and not something that she’d enjoyed...it was as if she had been punishing herself for the family she’d had once she’d learned it wasn’t perfect.
“Yes.”
She went to the kitchen and started to make hot chocolate because her gut was saying this was the moment to tell Sean about the baby. The day had faded into evening and they had decided to order in pizza from Lou Malnati’s, but that wasn’t going to arrive for a bit. Thinking of her past made her consider her future. How she wanted it to be, and she knew she wanted that family she’d always dreamed of. She wanted it with Sean.
“Can that wait?” he asked, coming into the kitchen.
“Sure.” She turned off the milk she’d started to boil and turned to face him. “What’s up?”
“I need your help with something in here.”
“Okay,” she said.
The living room had been transformed into a magical Christmassy place. He’d lowered the overhead lights and only the tree and the lighted garland over her electric fireplace were lighting the room. He’d changed the music to a selection of jazzy instrumental holiday tunes and she noticed that he’d taken some pillows from the couch and placed them close to the tree.
“It’s beautiful,” she breathed.
He stopped and drew her into his arms from behind her, resting his chin on her shoulder as he put his hands around her middle. He couldn’t know it, but his hands were right over their child. She felt nervous and scared, but the heat of his body behind hers soothed her.
They fit perfectly together, despite their height difference, which was something she’d rarely experienced in real life before Jack/Sean had come into her life. She knew that more than anything she was going to continue to struggle to trust him. The more he honest he was the more vulnerable she. She wished she could just let go of the past and enjoy this Christmas with him.
“This,” he said, gesturing around the living room, “is making me want to kiss you.”
“It is?”
He gave a small laugh. “Mmm-hmm. You’ve sort of been seducing me all day. With your Disney Princess ornaments and Disney Channel stars music.”