“You’re offering a lifetime responsibility you don’t seem to fully comprehend!” he snaps as he gets in his car and hurriedly speeds off.
Krysta glances over, spotting me, and rolls her eyes. “I’m wearing him down. He’ll be wrapped around my finger soon enough.”
She gives herself a pat on the back—literally—and struts away like she’s not humiliated by the public rejection.
“I don’t even want to understand why everyone is still more interested in me than the crazy shit that just went down,” Piper says evenly, casting a slanted look toward another shop with gawking patrons.
There’s a crackle, a screech, and a loud pop that snaps through the air. Immediately after, I hear Lindsey Stirling suddenly blasting over the town speakers. Piper startles for the hundredth time since we started our perilous trek down Main Street.
It seems like a lifetime ago at this point.
I forget why I hate coming to town…until I come to town.
The music gets louder and louder, spurring us all into action. According to Bill, this is a manly challenge. But as the violin plays and men come rushing out of the shops to start river-dancing alongside me, Piper just stares in…is that horror? Is she horrified?
“W-w-what are you doing? W-what’s going on right now?” she asks loudly, her voice barely carrying over the music as I try to keep from tripping myself with my own moves.
Bill comes through like he’s Lord of the motherfucking dance, a big-ass smile on his face. He said he wanted this for Penny, but I’m starting to think he enjoys it more than her.
“It’s a river-dance,” I tell Piper when she starts scratching her head, still waiting expectantly for an answer.
“I sort of figured out that much. Why are there men rushing outside to river dance?” she asks, only sounding more confused.
“Because they don’t want to swim the lake in a tutu while singing some girly song,” I explain, finally tripping over my own feet and barely righting myself before I go down.
I straighten abruptly, trying to recover by showing off some of my better moves. Bill swears it was his dancing that won Penny over, after all. There’s no way in hell he couldn’t have gotten her fair and square, otherwise.
Wild Ones Tip #349
If you don’t understand what’s going on, it’s because you haven’t been in Tomahawk long enough.
Chapter 7
PIPER
*******
I haven’t seen a pair of eyes yet that aren’t looking directly at me like I’m the only interesting thing in this town. I’m not interesting at all. I’m standing on a sidewalk while all the men river dance…
All the men are river dancing. Like it’s normal. Some are even competing and talking smack. None of them can dance. At all. Like…not even a little.
They all seem to think they’re wonderful at it, though…
I can’t even describe the level of befuddled I’ve reached in less than twenty minutes.
First there’s a crazy man who throws a hatchet—a freaking hatchet!—out of nowhere, with zero explanation, and immediately turns flirty when he notices me. Then there’s a public argument between a crazy stalker and her apparently rich, damn good looking object of obsession. Now…river dancing…
Why is anyone at all staring at me?
Being normal is weird in this town.
Blending in is not an option. There’s no way I can summon the confidence to dance like an idiot in the street.
“Flash mob?” I ask Kai, still trying to make sense of things.
“Flash mob? Is that where a bunch of chicks get together and flash their chests for guys or something? Gotta say, that’s a little off-putting. I don’t want a girl showing all the other guys her goods. What if that woman has my kid one day?” he asks me…
My mind keeps pausing and trying to process all the illogical things at once, but it’s overwhelmed. His answers only lead to more questions. It’s almost like stepping into a time warp in another dimension.
Shaking my head from all the many distractions that just lead to more questions, I ask, “Why would anyone have to swim in the lake with a tutu?”
“Because if you don’t do the manly challenges, you have to suffer the consequences,” he informs me, still horribly dancing.
I’m not sure what he thinks he’s doing, but it’s not river dance. Not at all. It looks more like one of those Hillbilly comedy shows where they all dance bad on purpose…
Running a hand through my hair, I lean back on the wall just to watch.
The song plays for what seems like forever, and people laugh, clap, dance, and sometimes even slap high fives as they show off their…moves.
My lips curve in a reluctant grin when I watch one older woman visibly swooning, following around the guy who danced in front of us earlier on his way through.
The music cuts out abruptly, and people move along like it never happened and I made it all up.