I’m so adrift. Connor has been my anchor for so many years. To have it yanked away without warning is jarring. Devastating. My mind is in so many places. I zone out for a while. I have no idea how long.
The stillness is what snaps me out of my trance. Realizing that Kris might be trying to reach me, I turn the phone back on.
Fatal mistake. The news alerts pop up one by one before I can adjust my Settings to shut them off.
Nanny Yolanda Gomez Claims Affair with LTZ Bassist Connor McGloughlin
Who Is Yolanda Gomez? 5 Things to Know About the Nanny Who Claimed She Had an Affair With LTZ Bassist, Connor McGloughlin
Nanny Yolanda Gomez Releases Viral TikTok Video Claiming She Had a Months-Long Affair with Ronni Miller’s Husband
Hot Nanny Shares Cryptic Message after Revealing Affair with Ronni Miller’s Husband.
Hot Nanny Apologizes to Ronni Miller about Affair with Connor McGloughlin.
Kris will have to wait. I can’t bear this shit.
I click the phone back off.
I’m in the middle of a nightmare. An absolute nightmare. I’ve never felt so alone in all my life. Connor’s honor is so important to him. Never, in a zillion years, would I dream he’d cheat on me. Hell, I’d peg Ty, Jace, and Zane as cheaters before I’d have believed it of my husband. None of those guys wouldeverstep out on their women.
Not in a million years.
As I obsess over the entire situation, one thing is for certain. Something about all of this is off. Yet, I can’t deny what I saw with my own eyes. While I can’t bear to ever watch one of those videos again, it was Connor. No question. It’s just…it didn’t seem like Connor.
How could that be?
With a sigh, I turn the phone on again to call Kris, who answers on the first ring. “Charter set for two thirty. Car will pick you all up and bring you to my house. Do you need beds for the boys? What else?”
“Goddammit.” I want to crawl out of my skin. “I need everything. Highchairs. Beds. Toys. It’s too much to ask, Kris. I’m stuck here. For now.”
“Ronni, you need to take a minute and think about things. Don’t throw away your marriage—”
I can’t help but interrupt, “What part of ‘he cheated on me repeatedly’ do you not understand?”
Kris sighs heavily. “I’m just saying, take a breath. You don’t always have to be on the run. I can have whatever you need delivered, babe. Come. Don’t come. It’s up to you.”
I’m quiet for a minute. Hearing myself talk makes me take a pause. “Kris, I owe you an apology.”
“For what, babe?”
“My heart is broken, there’s no doubt about it. Before I make any life-changing decisions, I should take a minute. I’ve crashed your morning, you’ve rearranged whatever it is you’re doing to accommodate me and the kids. No questions asked. You always do that for me and you never ask for anything in return.” My entire body aches with grief. Not just for what’s happening with me and Connor, but for how I’ve failed my mentor. Over and over. “I can’t think of one time you’ve needed me to do something for you. All you’ve wanted is for me to try and be your partner. Which I’ve sucked at. For years. So, yes. That’s my long-winded way of saying I’m taking some time to figure things out. Get my head on straight.”
Kris sniffles. This is a woman I’ve rarely seen cry in nearly two decades. “I just want what’s best for you. Ever since your mom died, I feel like you’re mine to protect.”
“I appreciate that. I love you. You’re family. I’ve got to figure out what I want to do with my life, Kris.” Tears stream down my face. What’s happening is so horrible. I never imagined I’d be in this position.
We end the call with a promise that I’ll check in later.
The boys are crashed out in the playpen, cuddled together. I sit cross-legged on the floor, leaning on the side of the apparatus watching them sleep. Clutching my phone tightly. Hoping Connor will text. Hoping he won’t.
Mostly wishing all of this were a dream I could wake up from.
Losing my family. My career. My dignity? My deep soul-crushing sadness is suddenly replaced with a jolt. Almost like I’ve been hit by lightning. I bolt upright.
Because-- holy fucking shit.
I’ve been so blind. So naïve.