The jarring sound of my phone ringing snaps me out of my sad trip down memory lane. Until, that is, I look at the caller ID. Sometimes I swear, my mother has ESP. How else would she know I was just thinking about how her divorce spiraled me into the hardest decision of my life?
“Hi Mom.”
“Serena, honey. How are you? How’s the studio?”
I settle back on the couch and take a sip of wine. Mom and I have one of those relationships that’s perfectly fine as long as we keep our contact limited. She’s come out here a few times, and we try to talk once every week or so.
We were closer when I was younger, but after my dad left, she kind of disappeared as well. Not physically but emotionally. And that disconnect has never really gone away.
“It’s fine, I started a new round of classes today.”
Keep the conversation light and easy. That’s the key with us. We don’t bother getting deep or emotional with each other anymore; we haven’t since I was a teenager. The last real conversation we had, we were in a therapist’s office, and I was trying to get her to explain why she and my dad hid their problems from me. She shut down and refused to say a word. That was the last time I ever bothered trying to talk to her about anything important.
“Great. Listen, I need to talk to you about something.”
Her tone makes me sit up straight. This doesn’t sound light and easy. Not at all.
“Okay, what’s up?”
“I heard from your dad the other day.”
“Wh-what?” I splutter, putting down my wine glass in shock.
“He wants to talk to you.”
“No. No way! It’s been years, Mom. I don’t want to talk to him.”
“Serena —”
“No,” I cut her off. Because there is absolutely no freaking way I can handle this today. “Mom, I have to go. I’ll talk to you later.”
I hang up before she can say anything else and turn my phone off.
What are the chances… Leo and my father, both surfacing from my past within the last few days. I’d really love to know why the universe is deciding to dump all my emotional baggage, that I thought was dead and buried, out in the open now.All. At. Once.
Chapter four
Leo
“Vi, kiddo, come on. You’re covered in spaghetti. It’s bath time.”
“No Daddy. No baf!” Violet streaks past me, naked except for the tomato sauce covering her face and chest. These are the moments that test my patience. When it’s nearing her bedtime, and I just want some peace and quiet for a couple of hours before I collapse into bed, I wish she wasn’t such a stubborn toddler.
Single parenting is beyond difficult. Like, more than I ever gave my mom credit. Granted, I was a little bit older when Dad died, but still. I have a lot more understanding for what she went through, all the time battling the grief of losing her partner. Fishing out my phone, I open my text conversation with her.
LEO: Hey Mom, thinking of you. Hope Arizona’s treating you well, you’ll have to come up here soon. This town is beautiful.
It’s a deliberate choice not to mention Serena just yet. My mom loved her, and until I know what’s going on with everything there, I don’t need my nosy matchmaking mother getting involved.
MOM: Hi honey, Phoenix is great. Hot! Almost too hot to be honest. I’m going to talk to Aunt Claire and figure out a trip soon, I miss my little Vi. Give her a smooch from Nana.
LEO: Will do. Love you.
I put the phone back in my pocket, shaking my head at Violet’s off-key singing coming from her bedroom.
I guess the silver lining in my situation is that I definitely don’t grieve Violet’s mom leaving. I wish she hadn’t done that to our daughter, but at the same time, it’s not like Alexa was a great mom even when she was around those first few months.
Doing right by my kid is my number one goal. It has been since the day she was born, and they put this screaming, red-faced, covered in a strange baby goo newborn into my arms. I knew then and there that, no matter my reservations, she had to be my priority. Everything I’ve done since has been because it’s what I hope is the best for her.