“Deal.”
I don’t think I’ve ever gotten ready for bed so quickly before, not even when Violet was a baby. But when I call Serena back, she’s already in bed, her head on a pillow that I wish mine was on as well.
“Next best thing to being with you, baby.”
“Thank you, Leo.” Her smile is a welcome sight.
“I’m always gonna be here for you, you know that. Even if it’s not in person, I’m here. I’ve got you. You’re not alone, Tippy. Not anymore.”
When I see a tear spill from her eye, I frown. “Shit, babe, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to upset you.”
“No, no, that’s a happy tear.” She wipes it away with a sniff. “I love you, Leo.”
“And I love you. I’m glad you called me tonight.”
“Me too.”
Even after Serena’s eyes drift closed and the phone falls to her mattress, I stay on the call, watching her sleep from afar.
I’ve had my life turned upside down exactly four times so far. The first was when my dad died. The second time when Serena broke up with me in high school. Then when Alexa told me she was pregnant, and then again when Alexa walked out on me and Violet.
Four moments in time that changed the course of my future dramatically. Four moments that could have led me in the opposite direction from where I am now. Yet despite all of that, all those moments that could have broken me, I can see now with perfect clarity that every turning point led me here. Led me back to Serena.
“Hey Vi, should we drop off some of those cookies you made yesterday for Serena?” I ask as I brush my daughter’s hair up into two pigtails, just like she asked.
“Uh-huh,” she mumbles around a bite of a granola bar I gave her to stop whining while I got her ready. She nods vigorously, making it pretty hard to work on her hair, but I’ve had plenty of practice over the years with a squirmy kid.
“Okay. Then let’s get going so we can do that before I take you to Aunt Claire’s house.” I lift her down from the bathroom counter and take her hand to lead her into the kitchen where she helps me choose three cookies for Serena and puts them in a bag.
It still takes us forever to get out the door because Vi is at that age where she insists on doing everything herself, even the things she really can’t, like putting her shoes on the right feet. But today, I don’t care. Despite the emotional weight of last night, I feel great. I feel clear, connected, and ready to prove to Serena that she belongs with me and Vi.
I’ll still give her whatever space and time she needs, but I’m also not going to let her doubt for one second that I’m in this for the long haul. She’s mine. Ours.
We pull up outside the studio, and I’ve only got a few minutes to spare before I’m meeting my aunt at the police station so she can take Violet for the day. Thankfully, Serena must have either seen us coming or be on her way somewhere because she’s locking the door of the studio when Violet calls out to her.
“Rena! Coo-tees!”
She turns around, startled, but I’m relieved to see she seems happier today, or at least tranquil.
“Hi, Miss Violet, what do you have there?” Serena drops down into a crouch as Violet barrels into her, the baggie of cookies smacking Serena lightly as Vi’s arms wrap as far around her as they can. She stands up with my daughter in her arms, and finally, she looks at me.
“Hey Tippy,” I say, giving her a slow, easy smile. Leaning in, I kiss her cheek, then take the bag from Violet’s hands. “Vi wanted to bring you some cookies.”
“Wow, thank you so much, Vi.” Serena hugs my little girl in tight, and it’s a struggle not to pull them both into my arms and never let go.
“Eat a coo-tee now?” Violet asks, and Serena and I both laugh.
“It’s a little early for cookies, baby girl, and we have to get going to meet Aunt Claire.”
Serena sets Violet down on the ground. “I’ll see you soon at dance class, okay?”
She straightens and looks at me, her hand reaching out, then dropping back to her side as if she isn’t sure what to do or how to act. I don’t blame her, I don’t know how affectionate to be in front of Violet. I’ve never had to consider that before, or wonder what she might think about me kissing a woman.
But damn, do I ever want to kiss Serena right now.
Before I can overthink it, I do just that. I press my lips to hers, briefly, but it’s enough.
“I’ll talk to you later, okay?” I say, pitching my voice low enough so that hopefully Violet doesn’t hear. “It’s good to see you smiling again.”