“Is that what you think I’m trying to do?” Joel said in disbelief.
“It’s what everyone’s trying to do! Five years we’ve been kept apart because of people like you who thought they knew better. Mom leaving ruined everything. Everything was broken. Now I finally have a chance to fix it, and you think I should just go home?”
Joel looked stunned and hurt. “Are you listening to yourself right now? I know you think the world is plotting against you, Zadie, but it isn’t. You got dealt a shitty hand, but you’re not the only victim here. Finn lost her mom, too.”
“You think I don’t know that?” she snapped. “I’m doing this for her. I drove across the country forher.”
“Finn needs help.”
“She has me!” Zadie was trembling with anger. She barely noticed the frigid wave that broke around her ankles. “I’m the one who found her in those woods. I can keep her safe.”
The heat behind Joel’s eyes tempered. “I hope you’re right,” he said sadly, then turned abruptly and walked back to camp. Zadie watched him stop beside the tent and briefly bend down next to Finn’s pack before disappearing behind the wooden fence that separated the road from the beach. Zadie returned to camp herself and noticed something small safety-pinned to the strap of Finn’s pack: an embroidered patch of a bright yellow bird.He must have taken it off his hat,Zadie thought as the fire in her gut diminished and was replaced with regret.
“Joel, wait! I’m sorry!”
But by the time she reached the fence, he was already gone.
That morning, it felt like a starter pistol had gone off in Finn’s brain. For the first time in days, she felt like something resembling her old self. The heartbreak that had been her near-constant companion during their stay at the Van Houtens’ had dissipated. Now she was free to feel as sad or as happy as she wanted.
The tent flap was open and waved in the salty sea air. Finn peeredout at the wedge of gray sky and water. This wasn’t the kind of beach you spread your towel out on and worked on your tan. It was the kind of beach on which you found yourself shipwrecked.Maybe that’s all driftwood is,Finn thought.Broken masts worn smooth.
Zadie stepped into view, a blanket wrapped around her shoulders. For several minutes, Finn watched her watch the ocean. She’d heard raised voices earlier that morning. She’d only caught bits and pieces of Zadie and Joel’s conversation, but she’d picked up enough to know it hadn’t gone well.
Finn crawled out of the tent and hobbled over to Zadie on her bandaged feet. “Where’s Joel?”
Zadie turned to her, withdrawn. “He had to go.”
“Oh… He didn’t say goodbye,” she answered, disappointed.
“He left you something, though. Check your bag.”
Finn smiled when she saw the tiny yellow bird. “I’m going to call him Chris.”
“Are you sure you want to do that? You’ve had pretty bad luck with Chrises.”
“Yeah, but this one can’t fly away,” she said as she pinned the bird to her hoodie.
Zadie squinted at her. “What’s that on your hand?”
Finn flipped her hand over and pulled up her sleeve. In black permanent marker, the wordnestwas scrawled repeatedly from palm to elbow. She let out a sharp breath. “I must have done it in my sleep.”
“Do you know what it means?”
“I think it’s from the echo I had when I was lost in the woods. Mom wrote it on Rowan’s hand.”
“Why Rowan?”
It was only then that Finn remembered what Rowan had said to Amy: “She called me Zadie.” She turned to her sister. “Because Mom thought she was you.”
“Me?” Zadie pulled her blanket tighter around her shoulders. “She was trying to give me a message?”
“I think so. There were other letters, words maybe, but they weresmudged.Nestwas all I could make out.”Nest.The word meant nothing to Finn. What could her mother have possibly been trying to tell them?
“What happened next?”
“I don’t know. I just kept running.” Suddenly an echo crashed into Finn’s field of vision. It was so brief that she hardly knew it was happening, but the image lingered.
She wades into the ocean, the fog