Thehardesttransitionfor me, as a struggling poor child, into my new adult life as a wealthy woman, has been the way rich people act. They’re entitled.
I don’t mean the upper middle class, the ones who drive BMW SUV’s and place their children in private schools that aren’t super expensive. The kind I’m referring to come from old money, or own large corporations. I mean the one percent of the United States. I mean my ex-husband. The bastard has never wanted for a thing in his life. He’s never experienced a tight paycheck, or the need to skip a meal. He has everything and it fucking shows.
I flip through the new court custody files that he is attempting to get me to sign. He wants to switch our fifty-fifty living arrangements to seventy-thirty. He wants me to have her only two out of three weekends and is requiring that Dominic not be present.
A selfish fucking prick is what my ex-husband is, if he thinks this will get any further than it already has. I angrily scratch out a line of the document, then write in margin that I pay one hundred percent of Charlotte’s medical bills, and she is on my insurance.
If he wants to be petty, I will bring my A game. Our divorce was cordial, and we didn’t argue over anything. I gave him split custody of Charlotte. I never asked him to split any medical or school expenses. I even pay for all of her activities and school fundraisers. I’m the primary parent, even if he doesn’t realize that.
Matthew has more money in his stock accounts than I do in my checking account, yet he doesn’t spend a dime on anything. He insisted on private school, yet I’m the one paying for it. He has piss poor accounting skills, and a horrible spending and gambling habit.
“I’m headed to work.” Dom’s voice comes from across the master bedroom. He is closing the bathroom door while I sit at my desk. As he walks toward me for a kiss, I look up and force a smile.
I’ve been so stressed with this bullshit with Matthew, and Dom has been busy fielding calls from his mother that we haven’t had much time together lately. We also put his official moving in on hold because of the custody battle.
When he reaches me, he leans down and presses a kiss to the top of my head. “Have a good day.” I mumble and return to the document.
He sighs, and I can hear the exhaustion in it. I know him just as well as he knows me. He hates that I’m so engrossed in this that it takes up all of my time. “Make sure you shower today,” he whispers, running his finger along my hairline, from my eyebrow to my ear.
I don’t look up as I scratch out another line. His hand rests on my shoulder and squeezes, then he lets out another sigh. This one irritates me. I’d rather he just say what’s on his mind, then let out the dramatic breath. I drop my pen, tensing as I turn to look up at him.
“What’s bothering you, Dom?” I ask, my voice strained.
“I hate seeing you so stressed. What can I do to help?”
I let out a pathetic chuckle. “There’s nothing. It’s my fault. I’m the one who broke his heart. I’m the one who fell in love again with someone I shouldn’t be with. It’s my mess to clean up.”
“Wow. I didn’t realize I was such a burden to be with.”
“You think you’re a burden?” Though I am shocked by his words, I am also angered by them. Everything I do is to make him feel welcomed. “Dominic, I’m fighting this because I want you. If you were a burden, do you think I would be doing all of this?”
“It isn’t healthy, Andi. You’re up all night, you haven’t showered. I don’t want this for us. Please.”
“He is going to take her. Don’t you get that? I can’t stop. Not until this is settled.”
He lets out another one of his exasperated sighs. “I think we should take a step back from this.”
I drop the pen in my hand and slowly stand. “What?” I whisper. He can’t mean that.
“Just until he backs off. Give him what he wants, Andi. We can call it quits for a bit while he cools off. Charlotte comes first.”
“Of course, she comes first! You think I don’t know that?” My voice shakes. I can’t even comprehend this feeling. It isn’t anger, it’s more fear. Fear of everything I believed would happen is happening. Dominic’s leaving me again.
I shake my head frantically. “No. No, Dominic. You promised me!” I start to hyperventilate, trying to catch my breath, as he turns to leave my room. I don’t know if I can handle him walking away again. It’s why I’d been so guarded in the beginning, why I didn’t want him. I shouldn’t have allowed him back in. I was too weak.
“I’m sorry, Andi. I won’t come between you and Charlotte. This is consuming you. It isn’t healthy. It’s what’s best.”
The walls are caving in on my perfect little world. My happiness can’t last more than a small amount of time before it’s ripped from me. “You’re not allowed to leave me. You promised!”
“I’m not leaving for good. It’s just until Matt calms down. I want you to be happy, Andi.” He turns to step close to me, and brushes his hand against my cheek.
“You don’t get to decide what makes me happy. If you do this, you’re walking out on me. I’m not going to keep taking you back whenever you decide it’s good enough for you.”
I step forward, letting the rage overtake me, my face heating in fury. “Don’t fucking leave me.”
Dom’s hands wrap around my waist, and he presses his lips to mine. I can feel it instantly. It’s a goodbye kiss, and my body melts into his, tears falling from my face. This is exactly what I didn’t want to happen. It took me so long to forgive him, and now he’s leaving me again.
My fists grip his shirt, and he pulls my hands from him. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. I love you.”
He turns his back to me and closes the door so gently. “No!” I scream, and the tears fall so freely, as I’m swallowed up by the floor.
He’s gone, after I begged him not to go.