October 17
The last couple of weeks were a lot of trial and error. My hand is doing really well, and they believe that I will regain some function, the pain comes and goes, but overall, it's bearable. Judson has a company to run but still manages to make time for us. If he's not here helping with JC, he's sending me groceries or diapers. My fear of him being a flight risk has begun to wash away slowly as he continues to prove that he is in it for the long run. We spent last weekend visiting my dad's grave in Tennessee with JC. It was the first time I had been there, and it gave me some closure I didn't realize I needed. My phone buzzes, and I can feel the excitement wash over me. Judson comes back today from a two-day conference in Atlanta, and I can't believe how much I've missed him in just two days.
Judson- Hey mama, I just got home. Meet me at the house at 8:00. Bring my boy, I have a surprise for you both.
I smile widely as I look at JC.
Blakely- Okay Dad. We'll be there.
The fluttering in my stomach sends me into a happy dance as I spin into JC's room to find his clothes. It makes me sad that none of his newborn clothes fit anymore, and he is already wearing three-month clothes. Growing like a weed is normal I guess. I quickly dress him and sit him in the bouncer, outside the shower. I take the fastest shower possible without neglecting personal grooming. My hair is a complete rat's nest as I drench it with leave-in conditioner and rake a brush through it. I throw on light makeup and blow dry my hair, opting for my natural waves.
We pull up outside of Judson's house. Before I can even cut the engine, he is at JC's door. He pushes the button to detach his car seat from the base and carries him for me. I hear him whispering to him incoherently. I roll my eyes, wondering what kind of scheme he is coming up with. He puts his arm around my shoulder, pulling me into a quick kiss.
"I missed you guys. Are you ready for the surprise?"
"You know I am." I squeal as we walk up the front steps.
"Happy Halloween!"
I feel as if all the air is stolen from my lungs. It is the most beautiful thing I have ever witnessed. The Christmas tree is enormous, probably twelve feet tall. Thousands of ornaments. Everything is lit up and sparkling. I drop my purse to the ground as he pulls me into his embrace.
"Do you like it?"
"Like it? I love it! It's beautiful." I feel tears pooling behind my eyes.
"You said Christmas was your favorite. So I figured instead of Halloween, we would just skip to Christmas."
He unbuckles JC and lifts him out of the car seat. I can see the lights reflecting in his eyes as he gazes around the room.
"Do you like it, little buddy?" Judson coos at him.
"I think he's speechless," We both laugh.
"There's more." He grabs my hand and drags me up the stairs skipping a few, making my heart drop, afraid that he will drop JC, even though I know he won't.
We round the top of the stairs, and he shoves the door open. It's a beautiful room. It's painted a pale yellow, navy sheer curtains line the windows. A large preds decal hangs over the crib. A rocking chair occupies the corner with a shelf of books next to it. Judson pulls me close to him as I take it all in.
"Blakely, I never dreamed that I could get so lucky. That I would have you and my son. I'm not perfect, and I know I can never be. I'm not half of what you deserve, but I'll spend every second trying to be that guy. I guarantee that there will be hard days, but they could never outweigh the amazing ones. I know you are scared, and so am I, but what we have is worth fighting for. We are worth it, Blake."
The tears stream down my face unconsciously as I think of how this is all I have ever dreamed about.
"Judson, you are more than I deserve." I choke out.
"Move in." He demands. "Move in here, where you and Jacob belong."
I shake my head vigorously, and he pulls me into a hug kissing me over and over again.
Judson puts JC to bed earlier than usual, and we make our way into our bedroom, sitting the monitor down on the nightstand. Everything is exactly as I remember it. Perfect.
I sit on the edge of the bed as he closes the gap between us. I push the hem of his shirt up, exposing his skin. He jerks his shirt over his head, and my hands roam all over his body. He pushes me down on the bed as I finagle my pants off and pull him closer to me. His lips find my neck, and he pushes my shirt up so he can roam light kisses all over my torso. I let out a breath. I feel as if I could just explode at any second without even really being touched. I can feel him grow between us, and he is just as ready for me as I am for him. The anticipation is killing me, so I roll him over and straddle him. His eyes go wide as I take control.
He hisses as I slide down on him. His hands grip my hips forcefully and up my back pulling me closer to him. Our rhythm is entirely in sync and slow. It feels as if we are one. The way he breathes into my ear sends me over the edge. I call out his name over and over as he comes undone.
I fall into the bed as I roll off of him. He pulls me into his chest closely, nuzzling his cheek against the top of my head.
"Any more surprises?" I chuckle.
"I can think of a few." He tilts my chin up, and our lips meet.