“You?” I teased.
“No, you. You have a woman upstairs who hasn’t managed to put the past behind her, and you sit here like a damn soldier trying to rule the world.”
I sat back, grabbing my watered-down drink. It was only eleven in the morning, but at this point time no longer mattered, one hour melding into a full day. I was determined to break down the information.
Then the sting would begin, one the FBI, the DEA, and almost every other law enforcement agency had hoped to achieve. They still had no idea the safety deposit box had been recovered.
“Which territory would you like?”
“Come on, Alessandro. Your almost bride had blood covering her beautiful dress, was almost killed, and I doubt you’ve spent more than a few hours with her. Am I right?”
I drummed my fingers on the desk, remembering the clear image of her face the moment I’d gathered her into my arms, crushing her against my chest as I told her she was safe. Her words? That she’d never feel safe again because monsters did exist. Little did Cruz know I’d watched over her every night, remaining in the chair beside her bed, allowing the darkness to provide me with some comfort while she’d wallowed in misery. The truth was I had no clue what to say to her.
“She’s free to return to her life. I’m striking a check for her payment later today.” I realized there was no emotion in my tone. None.
He slammed his hands on my desk, his gaze drilling into me. “Is that what you really want? Is all the money and power in the world enough to soothe the demons living inside of you?”
“It’ll be a good start.”
My brother backed away as if I’d just set him on fire, but his eyes remained blazing with an entirely different kind of passion than I’d ever experienced.
He had a lust for life.
I had one for blood.
Or was I fooling myself?
“When I was painting, I found utter joy that I believed no one could ever take away from me. No one. Because it was personal, allowing all the ugliness of who and what I’d been born into to shiver in the corner while my aspirations and dreams took hold. When our father stole it from me, acting as if I was nothing but a useless piece of flesh that had been born into our world, I believed him for years. Years. I tried to be a good soldier, learning the art of shedding blood, but it never brought me anything but a bad taste in my mouth. I believe you’re the same way.”
“Don’t fool yourself.”
His laugh was bitter, full of anger from everything he’d been through. “This,” he said as he swept his arm around the room, “is bullshit. Fake. It could be taken away at any time without notice or provocation. Does money buy happiness? If I’m any example to you whatsoever, I can tell you easily that it didn’t. I substituted boats and cars, every flavor of woman I could find. Nothing made me happy.”
“And what the fuck are you doing about it?”
He reared back as if I’d insulted him. “I’m painting again and for the first time since I was a damn kid, I look forward to getting out of bed every morning.”
I hadn’t known. Why hadn’t he told me?
Because you act like you don’t give a damn about family.
“That’s amazing,” I said, thrilled that he was doing what he loved again.
“Really? Aren’t you going to admonish me, or simply remind me that I have duty and honor to the family?”
“No.”
His eyes opened wide. “Then you just affirmed that I’ve been right about you and always was. I looked up to you, brother, because you challenged the system. You wanted to make it better for everyone, not just yourself. And believe it or not, that woman upstairs is your salvation, the single thing in your life that’s brought you happiness. Luckily, she’s flesh and blood, warmth and gentleness. You love her. One piece of advice. If you can’t return that love, at least be honest with her, but if you lie to yourself in order to do that, you’ll regret it for the rest of your life. The fork in the road is right in front of you. Choose wisely.”
The air in the room seemed to be sucked out as I processed his words. Without saying anything else, he walked out, leaving me with tangible ways of making billions of dollars while crushing a solid portion of our enemies.
But he was right.
I was fucking miserable.
After a few seconds, I rose to my feet, staring down at the priceless information. Then I raked my arm across my desk, pitching everything including my laptop to the floor. Nothing mattered any longer. Not a damn thing.
Except for the beautiful woman I’d stalked, seduced, and captured.