He might not have been tired anymore, but I was. What we did exhausted me. I curled into the covers, pulling them tight around me and squeezed my eyes closed. But the longer I laid there and tried to fall back to sleep, the more I missed Guy and the more I felt his absence. And not wanting to sleep through any more time without him, I changed my mind on getting anymore sleep and climbed out of the bed.
An urge to be in Guy’s presence came over me, and though I wasn’t sure what to think about it, I didn’t mind the change in me one bit either.
Maybe, if I was lucky, I could get a repeat of the night before.
But before putting myself in Guy’s presence, much less more sex, I needed to shower. And with no other clothes to my name, for the time being, I figured borrowing some of my brother’s wasn’t completely unthinkable. He had to have some sweats and a t-shirt somewhere.
About ten minutes later, I had everything I needed and stood under the warm, running water. Events from last night danced through my mind as I took my time washing my body and my hair. Each memory brought on a bigger smile than the last.
I never would have imagined, in a hundred years, sex could be that amazing. And so, so much better than the toys. Now that I understood and had experienced what the real thing was like, I doubted I would ever go back to my sex pillow.
“Sorry, but we’re through,” I imagined myself saying to the thing as I tossed it into the trash…Well, maybe not the trash. I would probably just put it high up in the top of my closet. The thing was expensive, after all. And it would be a shame to get rid of something so useful if things between Guy and I were to take a turn for the worse.
So… yeah… definitely in the far corner of my closet. Out of sight, and out of mind… but still around just in case.
And who the hell could have known the first time would be like that? I sure didn’t. From all the horror stories I was told and overheard, I had convinced myself the first time was going to be excruciatingly painful and uncomfortable.
However, I was over the moon happy none of those stories compared to my experience. It was so much better, sweeter, fulfilling, and satisfying. Good God was it satisfying. And though I felt satiated by the sex from last night, I did find that I was hungry for more. That at any moment, especially now, I could catch a craving for him.
I smiled.
The things he did to me. It was hard to imagine that sex could be as amazing and delicious as it was the first time every time. But I couldn’t wait to find out either.
I wanted more of him and didn’t want to wait any longer to set my eyes on him. So, I hopped out of the shower, dried off, and pulled on the sweatpants and t-shirt I borrowed from my brother. Before rushing out of the bathroom, I took a few seconds to run my fingers through my hair. And used one of the extra toothbrushes to freshen my breath.
The second I opened the door I was smacked in the face with the smell of breakfast. My stomach growled and my mouth watered.
Guy was making food.
I took the first couple of steps with a bounce and a smile stretching my lips. I was warm and giddy, and excited to greet Guy with a wet kiss. That was until he spoke, and I realized he was talking to someone. Judging by the lack of response, he was on the phone.
About halfway down the stairs, I took a seat and listened in, realizing he was on the phone, and it didn’t take very long for me to realize whoever he was speaking to must have been the same person that kept calling him and blowing up his phone. The one he kept refusing to respond to.
“That’s why you were blowing up my phone?” Guy asked. “Oh my darling… I’m so sorry.”
I rested my head against the wall and sighed. My little bubble of joy was seconds away from bursting. I held my breath before letting it go. I needed to give him the benefit of a doubt before getting carried away with assumptions. So, I listened to the conversation for a little while, before jumping to a conclusion that might not entirely be correct.
“I wish you the best of luck,” Guy said. His voice was soft and gentle. Almost sad. “I know new beginnings aren’t fun, but they are long overdue for us. Don’t you think?”
My eyebrows became knitted together and I frowned as a pinch settled in the center of my forehead. That wasn’t something you would say unless you were breaking up with them, right? That’s what it sounded like to me, and it was too close to comfort.
My little bubble started to break.
“I’ll be fine,” he said. “You just worry about you. Go do your thing. I’ll be okay. I promise.”
I sucked in a breath and shook my head. The conversation I was listening in on—the words that Guy was using—they were definitely words from a breakup talk. Tears stabbed my eyes and a lump formed in my throat as what I had suspected all along was being proven to me… after I gave myself to him.
That was it. My little bubble had burst. My happiness was ripped from me. All in the manner of a few minutes.
Guy chuckled. “Yeah. You deserve someone who’s going to give you the moon and stars. I hope you find that.”
I sucked in a breath. This couldn’t be real. There was no way I could believe my ears. But the more I listened, the more I was convinced he cheated on someone. With me.
I was the hussy homewrecker. I came between another woman and her man. I should have paid more attention to the signs. The red flags that he was waving in front of my face. I was too busy thinking about my desires to be bothered with seeing things the way they were. The way I should have seen them.
I was a fucking idiot.
I was blind and stupid, and I had made the ultimate mistake.