I laughed at the irony of his words. “But you did. You really hurt me, Matt. I’m still hurting,” I admitted quietly.
He strode toward me, closing the space between us. Pulling me toward him, he gently grabbed my chin, lifting my face to his, skimming his knuckles along my cheek. My breath hitched as his eyes bore into mine. “I’m sorry. I’m so fucking sorry for hurting you. For letting you walk away. For not being brave enough to explain. I’m sorry that I’ve spent all this time pretending I was okay with what I did to you. Watching you with that prick. I’m sorry for it all. But most of all, I’m sorry that I’ve made you feel anything less than the goddess you are. You deserve to be worshiped every fucking day. I just wish I was worthy of being the person to do it.”
Thepingof the elevator had us jumping away from each other like teenagers getting caught making out. Addi walked out, seeming to not notice the tension that hung heavy in the air. I went back to recycling the now empty bottles of alcohol and Matt moved to fill a bag for Tanner.
“Hey, you two. Matt, can you give that to Rylee and she will take it to him? Thanks.” As Addi spoke, Rylee, Tanner’s assistant, appeared from somewhere in the penthouse, looking nervous like usual. Matt nodded at Addi’s instructions before he vanished, not even looking my way, making my heart sink.Again.
The next morning, I woke early to a silent penthouse. Making myself a coffee, I turned to find a white box with a ribbon on sitting on the sofa, my name written on the envelope that sat on top of it. I pulled out the cream note with shaky hands, reading what was written.
Someone who loves you wouldn’t want to change a thing about you, Rogue. Remember that. Matt
Taking the lid off the box, I carefully peeled back the white tissue paper and laughed loudly when I saw what was inside. Pajamas.The Muppets, He-man,andSnoopyones. Running my fingers over the top of them, a huge smile spread across my face, and I couldn’t remember the last time I’d smiled and really meant it.
Chapter 9
Matt
“Howmuchlongerdowe have to be on this bus?” Neo whined.
“We’ve literally been on it for a day. You’ve got months ahead of you yet. Better get used to it, bud,” I replied, suddenly feeling like a teacher on a terrible school trip.
“So many men in one place can’t be normal.”
He was right. The security team had been bundled onto our own buses and there were six of us on here, including Rob, who was silently skulking around like an angry serial killer.Oh, the joys!
“I need a shower, some food and to sleep in something bigger than these bunk beds. I mean, they all have huge buses. Look what we have.”
“Dickhead,” I mumbled. “They have the big buses because they are the rich as fuck rock stars paying your wages while you swan around the world dressed in black, looking scary and getting more ass than you’d get if you got a job working in a club back home. We’ll be in the hotel tomorrow and you can enjoy all the perks they give youfor free. Ungrateful shit,” I grumbled at Neo.
“What’s got your back up?” he asked.
“You,” I yelled at him. Usually, I loved the bloke. He was great at his job, funny, and pretty easy to be around, but there was something about locking six grown men on a bus that sent us all a little stir crazy and it appeared it had made me a grumpy shithead and it was only day one.
Neo sighed, turning his attention back to his phone while Ed handed me a coffee. “Here, you look like you need this.”
“Thanks. Right, I suggest we eat and get an early night as the next few days are going to be crazy and as we have Emmy to watch now as well as Tanner’s unwanted attention, I need you all on your A-game.”
Rob, who was now sitting across from me, huffed.
“Problem?” I raised my eyes in his direction, taking a sip of my coffee while I glared at him.
“Nothing. I love working harder because he decides to bring hislittle friend.”
“Emmy’s working for the band. She’s as important to protect as the rest of them. And you don’t need to worry about working harder, Rob. I’m taking care of Emmy. You just need to focus on Tanner, as always. Surely you can do that without having a bitch-fit?”
Rob mumbled something I could hear, and I lost my temper.
“Let me make this really clear, boys. You’re here to do a job. If you don’t like it, let me know and I will happily have you shipped back home and find a replacement who does want to be here. Stop moaning. Stop complaining. Stop busting my balls and do your fucking jobs. Oh, and in case you need a reminder, if I see one of them going anywhere without security with them, I’ll sack you on the spot. Are we clear?”
“Yes,” they all murmured except for Rob, who just stared at me.
“Rob, are we going to have a problem?”
“No.”
“Good.” Standing from my seat, needing to put some space between me and them, I moved to my bunk before I exploded and made them all walk the rest of the way to the hotel.
Pulling across the curtain that offered me a tiny bit of privacy, I laid back on my bed, scrubbing my hand over my face, trying to shake off my shitty mood. I hated to admit that I was homesick. Homesick for my memories, for my solo life, and for being able to wallow in the sadness that I carried around like a protective shield. It was harder to be miserable and grumpy when you were in charge of so many people. I’d not thought that part through when I'd first agreed to work for the Cosmic Gods.