“When you were sick, I wondered if I’d lose you. I mean, what if they were waiting for you? To take you into heaven or whatever.” I couldn’t hide the sob that followed that sentence. Matt twitched his head, silently telling me to move closer.
“Oh, Rogue. I’m sorry that I left you alone for a while, but I know my wife wouldn’t have wanted me to give up on life. She would have told me to love harder, to laugh more, and to squeeze every last drop out of it. She would have wanted me to find you. I promise.”
“Really?”
“Really. You have given me a second shot at life. I love you. I want a future with you. I want a life with you.”
“Me too,” I whispered, scared to voice my hopes for us after everything we'd been through since we met.
“I spent so many years desperate to find the person that murdered my family and then there he was. In a police cell somewhere. I freaked out because suddenly I had answers and I needed to hear them. But nearly dying changed things. It made me realize that I want to live. Emma and Alfie would want me to live. I’m choosing you, Rogue. I’m choosing to focus on our life. I don’t want to forget about my past or how much I loved them, but you and I, we are starting a whole new chapter and I don’t want you to feel you’re living in a shadow or are second best. You have my heart, Rogue.”
“Okay.”
“Okay? Is that all I get?”
Now the tears fell freely because he was saying everything I wanted to hear, but there was something standing in my way. “I’m scared. Scared to admit how happy you make me. Scared to plan a future with you. Scared that it will all fall apart.”
He pressed his fingers to my jaw, lifting my face to meet his. “You have nothing to be scared about. You are it for me. Forever.” Matt leaned in closer and softly kissed away my sadness until my lips tingled.
“But you have your job,” I murmured. “I have to be who I am. Things will never be easy.”
“I will follow you to the ends of the earth if I have to. I will always protect you, Rogue. It used to be because it was my job, but now it’s because you’ll be my wife.”
“Is it wrong to admit that your words have made me so wet for you?”
Matt ran his hand up my thigh and groaned loudly as he found the damp material of my panties.
“I can’t believe you’re not commando, Rogue. It’s very unlike you.”
“I know, but you’re healing, so I’m being good. For now,” I replied with a wink.
Matt laughed so much, his cough started, stealing the air from his lungs. The nurse appeared, demanding he put his oxygen mask back on until his breathing steadied.
Once we were alone again, he pulled off his mask and held out his arms. “Get in here Mrs. Bear and let me hold you while I fall asleep because I don’t think I’m up to fucking yet.”
“Mrs. Bear. I like that,” I murmured as I pressed myself into his side.
“Good news, Matt. You can go home today. But I want to see you both in two weeks to check how you’re healing and no work for at least a month. Your body needs time to heal.”
“When you sayno work, do you mean no security work at all, or that I can sit in my office and plan for other people to do all the work?”
“Ideally, I’d like to say no work whatsoever, but if you have to work, then office based planning only. You’ve been through a lot. Don’t underestimate the effect it’s had on your body.”
“Oh, don’t worry, I’ll make sure he takes it easy, doctor. Thank you. For everything you’ve done.”
“Erm, doc. Important question. Sex. Yes or no?” Matt asked, his face calm and relaxed, while mine turned beetroot red.
“Yes, there’s no reason you can’t.”
Matt winked at me, and my nipples hardened while excitement flooded my panties.
“Come on, Bear, let's get you home and see how long you can go without needing a nap before we talk sex,” I leaned in to whisper as I helped him stand from the bed. The fire dancing in Matt’s eyes showed me exactly what I was going home to do, and I couldn’t wait.
“Thank you, doctor. I hope you don’t take this the wrong way, but I hope we don’t see you for a really long time.”
“Me too, Frankie. Take care of yourselves.”
“Penthouse or the cabin? It’s up to you,” Matt asked me.