“Well, she doesn’t want to see you, now get lost Credence.” Cairo tries to shut the door, but Creed slams his arm out to stop him. Harlem wrenches out of my hold and runs toward the door, Zeke spots him and is about to catch him when Creed shoves Cairo out of the way and bumps Zeke with his hip and sends him toppling to the side. Creed drops down and grabs Harlem then throws him up and catches him before holding him against his chest. I jump to my feet and begin to panic; Creed could turn around and run out of the room with Harlem before I could even stop him. His gaze swings to me and the happiness he displayed a moment ago at seeing his son vanishes, guilt and shame war inside his hazel eyes. I dart my gaze from him to the door and whatever he sees in my eyes has him deflating.
“C-can I just spend some time with him, please. I promise I’ll stay out of your way, and not even talk to you I…I just want to be with my son.” I stare at him with my mouth hanging open, I’m stunned at the sincerity in his voice and the fact that he isn’t demanding that I allow him time, he’s actually asking me. I nod my head and he smiles his thanks as he makes his way toward the table, Harlem in hand. Cairo pins me with a look, but I shake my head, I may be pissed at Creed, but I will never use Harlem against him. There’s tension in the room but I know Creed is choosing to ignore it. Harlem giggles and squeals when Creed tickles his sides.
“Want to play hide seek?” Creeds smirk morphs into a full-blown smile.
“Yeah, of course.” Harlem turns toward us and asks.
“You all want to play?” Each of us exchange glances but all agree, there isn’t any good hiding spots here, but we made it work. Ro and Zeke left mid-way through the game to try come up with a plan for food. It was only me, Sky, Harlem and the Reeves siblings in the room. We all sat down for some lunch and ate in silence; Harlem begins to yawn, and I can see in his eyes that he is ready for his nap. I push back from the table to lift him. Creed jumps to his feet with a look of concern on his face.
“What are you doing?”
“Putting him down for his nap?” It sounded like more of a question than I wanted it to, he relaxes his shoulders and moves around the table to stand in front of me.
“Can I do it, please?” I’m shocked he asked instead of demanded and also, I’m taken back that he said please. I nod and pass a tired Harlem to him; Creed cradles him against his chest and places a soft kiss to his head. I motion him over to the bed Harlem and I shared and grab one of his books from the bag Zeke packed.
“He likes this one, read it to him and he’ll fall asleep.” Creed nods and gets comfortable on the bottom bunk bed with Harlem as he begins to read to our son. I turn back toward the others and see Callie’s eyes mist, I got to admit, I’m a bit choked up as well.
Chapter Eight
Credence
I’m halfway through the book and my boy is already snoring. I close the book and smile down at him, I just put my son to sleep! I know to most that isn’t something to be celebrated but this is a first for me and I’m excited about it. I gently pull my arm out from under his head and slide out of the bed, I pull the throw blanket over him and just stand there watching him. What would it have been like if his sister survived? Would she look like me or Jess, would she be full of life like Harlem? I shake my head to clear those thoughts away; it’s hard to understand why I feel so hollow.
I wasn’t there but that doesn’t change the fact that it fucking hurts like hell to know I lost a child. Life fucking sucks, why couldn’t she survive? Why the fuck do people pray to a god if he takes the lives of children? I grit my teeth and spin around to find four sets of eyes on me, I run my gaze over each of them but when I land on Jess, I get mad. She had no right to keep this from me! I march over to her, and she stands from her chair, I see the others stand out of the corner of my eye but ignore them. Jess lifts her gaze to mine and I ignore the hurt in her blue eyes. I reach out and grip the back of her neck and clench tight enough to force her gaze higher but not hurt her. Cole growls in warning, fuck him, I growl back but don’t take my eyes off her.
“Creed––“
“Stay out of this California. This is between me and my deceitful baby momma.” Jess gasps at my words and her eyes harden.
“I haven’t lied to you about shit.” I laugh but there is no humor to it.
“You princess are a dirty little liar, yet you stand here on your high horse and look down your nose at me. Yeah, I lied and tricked you, but my lies will never amount to the shit you lied to me about.” She tries to pull out of my hold, but I don’t release her, I pull her closer and relish in the way her eyes darken and growl tears from her throat.
“I have no idea what you––“
“What’s her name?” Her brow furrows in confusion and her growling cuts off. I see the others sharing looks of confusion amongst themselves.
“Who’s name Credence? I have no idea what––“
“My daughter!” I scream at her. “What’s my daughters’ fucking name Jessica?” I’m vibrating with rage, but when her eyes begin to fill with tears and her bottom lip begins to tremble my rage flees. I drop my hold on her and step back, Callie and Sky move around and stand behind Jess, each of them rest a hand on her shoulders in silent support. “What. Is. My. Daughters. Name?” Silent tears trek down her face as she shakes her head.
“I...I c-can’t.” I narrow my eyes at her.
“You can’t or you won’t?” She drops her gaze to the floor. “I fucked up and I owned my shit princess. I have said sorry more times than I can count, but you hid something ten times worse from me. You hid my fucking kid from me and failed to mention that I had a fucking daughter!” I yell the last part and cringe when I hear Harlem startle awake, I glare at Jess when she tries to go to him. “I got it.” I snap as I make my way over to my son. I ignore Jess’s sobs as I rock Harlem back to sleep, I tuck him back in and then move back toward the table where Jess sits between my brother and sister and Sky sits next to her mate glaring at me, I glare right back.
I drop into a chair opposite Jess and glare at her. I know I’m being an asshole but right now I don’t give a fuck, my heart is fucking aching and I need someone to take my anger out on.
“Calm the fuck down.” I turn and glare at my brother, we may not be twins but we look so much alike except for the fact Cole’s eyes aren’t hardened but the trials of life. Dad and I made sure to keep Callie and Cole as sheltered from pack politics as much as we could.
“Don’t Colton, I know you…. Care about her but right now I need the truth. It wasn’t just her that lost a child, I did to, and I have a right to know what the fuck happened to my daughter. You owe me that much princess.”
“Sweetheart you don’t have––“
“I know.” She cuts Cole off and lifts her gaze to meet mine. The brokenness in her eyes guts me but I make sure to not display any emotion on my face. “I got Hyperemesis Gravidarum, it’s like extreme morning sickness and very rare. I also developed Anemia and went into labor early because I went into kidney failure, we tried everything. I didn’t even know I was pregnant with twins––“
“How could you not know?” I wasn’t asking to be an ass, but I am genuinely curious as to how she didn’t know.
“They were mirrored, it means they were back-to-back, and we couldn’t see two babies or even hear two heartbeats because of them being mirrored. I was sick the whole pregnancy, we tried everything to hold off, early labor, but nothing worked. I went into labor at 36 weeks, Harlem came out and he was fine, he was early, but we didn’t see anything medically wrong with him, five minutes later more contractions came and then Cole said he could see another head which scared the crap out of us. I gave birth to the most beautiful baby girl… Her name is Katharine Tennessee Reeves, she had beautiful blonde hair and hazel eyes. She was…perfect.” Jess breaks down into uncontrollable sobs and I snap. I jump up and move around the table, I shove Cole aside and pick Jess up and then take the seat she was sitting on and hold her in my arms as she breaks down. I bury my head in the crook of her neck and just hold her. My heart breaks for her and the child we lost, for the child we will never get to know. Jess continues to sob into my chest as I pull back and look at my brother.