Trent nods back before he turns to walk away, and I expect us to also head towards Zander’s car. But instead, Zander calls out to Trent just before he reaches his car, causing him to stop and look back at us.
“Still can’t get it running?” He asks him.
Trent hesitates for a moment, and it seems like he’s debating answering before he simply shakes his head. He looks sad, and I’m not sure if it’s because he admitted that or because of whatever it is that Zander’s talking about.
Zander huffs before giving my hand a slight tug to move with him as we head back to his car. “Bring it by the shop next weekend, and I’ll see what I can do.” He says as he opens my door for me to get in. I don’t; instead, I stand there again, looking back and forth between them, confused out of my mind.
These two cycle through emotions so quickly I feel like I have whiplash just listening to one of their conversations.
“You don’t have to do that. I’ll get it eventually. I know you guys don’t do handouts.” Trent tells him, and his words almost sound cold but not quiet, more on guard than anything.
“Just keep looking out for Jade, and we can call it even.” Zander tells him in a serious tone that has me looking at him with suspicion.
His seriousness lasts only a moment before his signature unhinged smile is back to play. “Besides, you know I’ve always wanted to get my hands on the beast.” He tells him, and Trent actually barks a laugh before shaking his head.
“Yeah, okay, I can do that.” He tells him before he gives me a wave and a smile and gets into his car. He pulls out of the spot and is gone. As his car gets smaller and smaller, I can’t stop myself from turning to Zander.
“Were you just nice to Trent?” I ask him with a real hint of disbelief in my voice.
“Har har, laugh it up. I can be nice when I want to be.” He says to me before leaning forward into my space. “I’m nice to you all the time, Doll.” He says, and his voice once again drops low. The first time in the hall, I could have said he did it to be funny but to do it again so soon lets me know he knows exactly what that tone does to me, and I can’t decide if I love that or hate it.
I push him back playfully, “Oh, I know just how nice you can be. Heavy emphasis on the can there, Zander. I just didn’t think out of everyone that you would be being nice to Trent.” He motions me towards the open door again, and this time I slide in because he wasn’t joking earlier. We do need to get moving so we aren’t late.
He closes the door behind me, and I buckle up while he goes around and gets behind the wheel. Then, he pulls out of the lot and heads back to the house.
“We didn’t always have such an issue with each other, Doll.” He tells me after a few minutes, and I find that hard to believe. It must be clear by the look on my face because he just chuckles low before continuing.
“I know it might be hard to believe for you because you have only seen us like this, but once, not that long ago, it wasn’t just Roderick, Spencer, and me.” He gets quiet, and I don’t push him for more. I have a lot of my own shit that I don’t know if I will ever want to share, but I know if I do, I’ll only share it because I want to, not because I feel pressured. And I don’t want to do that to Zander.
As much as I didn’t plan to be here, I also didn’t prepare to feel anything for anyone around me. At this point, that has been shot to shit, but I do know I don’t want to do any damage, either. I want Zander to trust me almost as badly as I want to be able to trust him, all of them.
Fuck, every day, it gets harder to remember this is temporary.
“Trent grew up with us. That’s why Hazel is like a little sister to us because, for a long time, that’s exactly what she was, our best friend's kid sister. In many ways, she always will be because no matter how we feel about Trent, looking out for Hazel will still be second nature.” Zander keeps his eyes on the road as he tells me this, and I watch his face for a moment before looking out the window at the town around us as it passes.
It’s about an hour's drive back to the house, and after about ten minutes, I’m tempted to turn on the radio just to break the silence.
“Some shit happened a few years ago, and Trent’s dad was killed by the gang that used to run the city before Vengeance.” He finally says, his voice quiet, but I can still hear the sadness in each word.
After a moment, he looks over at me, and the sadness is clear on his face. It shocks me how much his sadness affects me. Zander is always happy, smiling, and making jokes, and even when he’s occasionally upset or serious, it never lasts long, at least not that I’ve seen.
This is different. I can tell from the look on his face that this has been affecting him. If it happened years ago, and he still looks this torn up over it, it must have been much worse when it was fresh. I wonder if anyone else knows he’s been carrying this around. I can’t imagine Trent does, but what about Spencer and Roderick?
I reach out and put my hand on his knee in what I hope shows support. I can’t do much, but if being here is something that can help him, I’m happy to do that. He gives me a slight smile before he turns his attention back to the road, but it looks forced, not at all his usual smile. After a moment, he drops one of his hands from the wheel to lay on top of mine.
“It wasn’t any of our faults, but Trent couldn’t get over that we were trying to be a part of Sin, and they were the ones who took his dad. By then, Vengeance had already started moving in on them, so we weren’t even trying, but he still wasn’t happy. Some shit was said, a lot of crap happened, and I don’t even know what the final straw was anymore.” He lets out a shaky breath before he continues.
“But when it was all said and done, Trent couldn’t even look at us anymore. We lost someone who was like a brother to us, and that’s what was most upsetting. We thought we could get through anything together after spending our whole lives fighting for what we wanted against everyone else. We never thought something could come between us, and by the time we realized that's what was happening, it was too late.”
“I tried to patch shit up a few times, but it never worked out, and now it’s just past all that. We work together under Froggie, and he hates it because of what happened with Sin, but our hands are tied.” He shakes his head a few times as if to get himself under control, and I get it.
Life’s full of bullshit, but it’s one foot forward or one in the grave, and sometimes all you can do is push past the shit.
“I saw the way you looked at him.” He says after a few. I open my mouth to respond, but he continues before I can say anything.
“It’s not a big deal, Jade. I want you to be happy. I might not like Trent, but he’s not a bad guy. So if you want him around as a friend or something else, I can live with that. In the same way, I don’t care if you spend time with Kratos. I’m just happy to have you here.”
I don’t know what to say to that because nobody has ever cared about my happiness before, and they definitely haven't cared enough to make themselves uncomfortable just for my benefit. So instead, I stay quiet.