So, just like Luca had said, the worst Will could say was no. He’d said it, and I had somehow managed to make it through the moment without having an outburst.
Luca had been wrong about one thing, though. He’d said I would be no worse off than I was before, but it wasn’t true.
Sure, nothing hadreallychanged—no plans had been made or altered—but that little bit of hope that had started to bloom inside me had officially died, and I hadn’t been prepared for just how desperate and alone that would make me feel.
Chapter Eighteen - Brady
I hadn’t spent much time at the flower shop over the weekend—as little as possible, really—and the distance had helped to clear my head a little.
At first, I’d wanted nothing more than to clear the air with Joanne, to somehow prove that I wasn’t the bad guy. But as the days passed, so had the urgency I’d felt to defend myself.
I’d barely even seen Joanne at work after our disastrous dinner, and the few times wehadbeen in the same room, the shop had been busy enough that it would have been weird to bring up the drama from that night.
And now, well… almost a week had passed, and the timing just wasn’t right anymore.
Besides, when we had opened the shop together that morning, Joanne had brought coffee and bagels for the two of us. If she wanted to make a peace offering and move on, I was definitely okay with that—preferred it, really, rather than diving into feelings and emotions and drawn-out apologies.
Still, it felt like there was something that remained unsaid between the two of us, and it had been weighing on my mind more and more with each passing day.
I turned to face Joanne, who was just a couple of feet away in the cramped office and mid-bite into her bagel. And then it hit me.
The thing that had been left unsaid was an apology. I might not want to rehashallof my feelings—I might not have much else to say at all on the subject, really—but Joanne had clearly been beyond just upset, and I knew it was because of me. She had made that fact perfectly clear at dinner the week before. And for that, even though it hadn’t been intentional, I owed her an apology. I’d never intended to upset her, and I never wanted it to happen again.
I just wasn’t sure how tosayall of that.
“I just wanted to say I’m sorry,” I blurted out, earning a surprised look from Jo as she struggled to swallow a large bite of bagel.
Damn, that’ll be my luck. I’ve shocked her by being nice, and now she’s gonna choke to death.
Joanne didn’t choke, though, thank God. Shedidmake a pained expression, but I wasn’t sure if it was the quantity of bagel that she’d just swallowed or the subject matter at hand that had caused the look to cross her face. I just hoped she’d understand, that she’d accept the apology, and that we could both move on.
“You’re… sorry?” Joanne asked, furrowing her brow once she was able to speak again. “For what? We haven’t even opened for the day yet… what could you have done?”
I did my best to stifle a grin, because even though this wasn’t the moment for it, I couldn’t help but notice how cute she was when she was confused and concerned. Then again, Joanne looked cute every time I saw her, so I shouldn’t have been surprised that the woman could even make confusion look sexy.
“For the other day…” I continued, trying to focus on just getting the apology out there without stopping to daydream about Joanne. “Last week, I mean… at dinner?”
She snorted, then rolled her eyes. “I’m pretty sure I’m the one who should be apologizing for that. And Iamsorry. I just…”
“No,” I said, shaking my head.
Fuck. I’d made her feel guilty or… something. That wasn’t what I had intended at all.
“Please don’t. You don’t need to apologize for anything. I understand why you were upset. Or… I mean, maybe I don’tcompletelyunderstand, but… I think I do. Anyway,” I paused and took a deep breath.Where was I going with this again? Right. Apologize. Now. “I’m sorry. I never wanted to upset you, and I hope we can move forward with a clean slate.”
Joanne blinked, then smiled, then blushed a deep shade of pink. “I don’t know what to say…”
I grinned, my heart doing a slow roll in my chest from the way she was looking at me. “Do you forgive me?”
“I do. Of course, I do.”
She cleared her throat and looked away quickly, shuffling the papers in front of her as she brushed away some bagel crumbs and moved her coffee from one side of the desk to the other, then back again.
I had to bite my lip to keep from laughing.
Joanne probably had no idea how cute she looked when she was flustered, but…damn, it was doing things to me—things that were making me feel flustered, too.
I was grateful when, after a long, silent minute had passed, she changed the subject.