“Does it turn you on?” he asked quietly.
“Letting Merrick touch me in exchange for an alliance?” I whispered.
He nodded.
“Yes,” I said, unashamed.
There was no point in denying it. He could tell it aroused me when he called me his property. He’d felt the response in my body too many times to pretend otherwise. There was something about giving up control to him that gave me such a sweet high I couldn’t stop chasing it.
“Why?”
Was there an edge to his voice?
“Because I like letting you control me,” I admitted. “I like it when you call me your property. I might not love you, but I do like belonging to you. The thought of letting you use my body for your alliance is…it does things to me. You said it yourself—I crave attention.”
It hurt to speak the words aloud, but at least they were honest. He was quiet. I blinked, my lashes wet.
“Am I a bad person, Peregrine?” I whispered.
“No.” His voice cracked. “No, you’re just human.”
His lids flickered and his grip tightened on my hand, but he didn’t meet my eyes. I waited in silence for him to look at me, but he didn’t move until the waiter appeared to take our order. There was a soft, dull ache in my chest that confused me and I pushed it away and poured myself another glass of wine.
When we returned to the house, he guided me into the house as he always did, but he didn’t linger. I stood at the bottom of the stairs and watched him disappear down the hall. Heading to his studio that he always kept locked. Feeling distantly lonely, I padded upstairs in the dark and got ready for bed. He still hadn’t returned when I slid between the silk sheets and turned out the light.
CHAPTER SIXTEEN
PEREGRINE
After we left the restaurant, she went up to bed and I retreated to my studio. It was another long night where I tripped into bed long after midnight. We had barely spoken after our dinner and subsequent argument, but I still sank between her thighs and kissed her calves and ankles until she woke. Without saying anything, she parted her legs and I licked her sweet, soft pussy until she came on my tongue. Then I kept going until she was so exhausted she couldn’t keep her eyes open.
The next evening, I found myself walking into the darkened back room of a cocktail bar along the river. I’d made sure no one knew where I was going. This was an uncomfortable enough conversation as it was. I didn’t need anyone knowing what I was doing out so late or who I was meeting.
Merrick stood at the empty bar. He wore a tailored suit and there was a glass of whiskey balanced in his fingers. He turned it back and forth slowly, holding it up against the lights behind the bar to watch the amber liquid glitter. I paused in the doorway and my pulse moved slow in my ears.
Was this a stupid idea? I didn’t really know this man. Yes, I’d spent the last few weeks negotiating with him, talking business, and maintaining a casual relationship so that I could get what I needed. But was it wise to let him into the secret parts of my marriage, into such an intimate area of my life? What if he hurt Rosalia?
I crossed the room and took the seat beside him. He didn’t turn around as I ordered a vodka on the rocks. The room was empty save for us and the bartender, but one gesture toward the door from Merrick sent her scurrying behind the curtain.
“You finally have something to say to me,” Merrick said lightly.
I sat back. “You can’t fuck her.”
Merrick swirled his glass and pushed his chair so he could face me. I met his cobalt gaze head on and I was surprised to see there was raw honesty in them.
“She told you she wanted it, didn’t she?”
“What makes you say that?” Anger flickered in my chest.
“She’s a wallflower, albeit a beautiful one,” he said, shrugging. “She doesn’t have the luxury of being coy about her desires.”
“She’s trying to prove something.”
“And you, Mr. Calo? What are you trying to prove?”
I sneered over the rim of my glass. “I have nothing to prove. Especially not to a man who fucks the wives of his political opponents to degrade them.”
Merrick sighed. “This time, I’ll sign the alliance without it. I just wanted to put the thought in your head. The minute I walked into your house I zeroed in on you and your wife as the most interesting people in the room.”