“I’m not—” she begins, but I haven’t finished yet.
“Yes, you are. Own it and make the best of it. If you keep fucking around like this, you’re going to ruin your whole damn future. You’re hot as hell, but I refuse to be a part of your self-destructive spiral. Either admit you’re an alpha and fall in line with Drakewood expectations or don’t, but leave me out of it.”
I don’t wait for her response. I just storm away and hope I’ve gotten through to her.
seven
AMBER
Gabe’s harsh words stab at my heart, infuriating me to such a degree that even I can admit I probably need to go to that Anger Management class. Holding on to the possibility of the world being wrong and me actually being an omega is the only thing around here that’s been able to comfort me. Having Gabe rip that Band-Aid off breaks something fragile inside me, something I didn’t know was still there.
Growing up, I’d looked forward to manifesting as an omega, just as my sisters had done. To claiming my pack. To living my own happily ever after.. I’d prepared for life as an omega as long as I can remember, a cozy dream of happiness that kept me going through all of Mother’s bullshit. Even after what happened with Jade, after being told I was an alpha, and being sent here to this Godforsaken academy—none of it had been enough to extinguish that last flickering hope.
Gabe, however, did just that. I’m sure it was all part of some misdirected cruel-to-be-kind sense of duty, but his words killed a part of me. And now I need some time to mourn it. Alone.
Fuck Anger Management. I could miss one class without throwing away my entire future, couldn’t I?
With my mind made up, I storm into my room and wedge the spare dresser against the door, crank my Bluetooth speaker up to maximum volume, then let myself cry for all that I had lost in such a short period of time.
The Warden may have taken my phone, but thank God I still have my anachronistic iPod. I’ve been letting it lull me to sleep for as long as I can remember, and it’s become something of a comfort blanket to me. Exactly what I need right now. Besides, I can’t imagine how much worse it could be if those assholes actually knew they’d broken me.
I cry for what feels like hours, though the sun remains high in the sky, mocking the slow passage of time.
And even before my tears dry up, I can feel something growing, stretching, snarling to replace the broken thing inside me. Something hard and solid, and not fragile at all. A conviction of self, of who I really am and have always been. My lungs expand on the new and release the old. I finally embrace the truth and breathe a sigh of relief that’s been a long time coming.
I am an alpha.
I may not be a hulking giant of man meat, but I am an alpha all the same.
And if I want to get these bastards to leave me the fuck alone, I need to earn my place on the social ladder bybeingan alpha. I have no interest in Beau’s social charity protecting me. I want the other students to swerve out of my path when I walk down the hallway.
Size doesn’t matter; it’s all about attitude. If it’s true about dicks, then it can be true of people too.
The powers that be want me to suck it up and accept that I’m an alpha.
All right then, I’m going to be more alpha than the biggest, baddest asshole in this entire academy.
Ideas for how I’ll assert my dominance over the clowns in this place start flying through my brain, and I mentally snatch some of the better ones to store away for later.
I can no longer be the omega I thought I was.
I sure as hell am not going to be the kind of female alpha Warden Black has made herself to be.
So it’s time I forge my own path, become my own kind of alpha.
And I know just how I’m gonna do it.
THEODEN
“Amber, please see me after class.” I stand from my desk, eyeing each student as they leave my classroom. Amber remains seated, head bowed, and looking like she hasn’t slept. Her scent has changed a bit, too. Warmer. Sweeter. I can’t place exactly what it means, but I sense she might need someone to talk to. Being the only female student would weigh heavily on anyone.
“I don’t have time for this, Professor Hudson. I can’t be late for class,” Amber says, gathering her books and finally standing.
“I’ll write you an excuse. It is my job to assess my students daily, and you…seem a bit off. I wanted to check on you. Make sure you’re adjusting okay.” I swallow, choking on the dryness in my throat. It’s not actually my job to look after the students beyond teaching them the material, but I don’t know what else to say to remain professional while also showing Amber I care.
She cocks her head, letting strands of her blond hair fall over her shoulder. “I’m fine, but you can still write me that excuse.”
Sighing, I mess with the sleeve of my button-down. “I understand if you’re uncomfortable confiding in me, but I want to make it clear that you can speak freely with me. I can sense you’re having a difficult time and would like to see if I can help.”