I lead Lily around the side of the house to the garage, where I punch in the code to open the door. As it starts to rise, Neil’s voice calls out from inside.
“Can I help you?” His tone is loud and full of authority, and I instantly tighten everywhere, ready to fight. This isn’t his fucking house. It never was.
“It’s me,” I grit out. Lily squeezes my hand again, reminding me to keep a level head.I’ll do my best, Lil. I’ll do my best.
“Oh. You know you can come through the front door like a normal person,” Neil grunts. By the time the garage door is raised enough, we get the view of him turning around and pulling his pants up over his belly as he hobbles back toward the door.
“I could, but not really into ringing my own doorbell. Call me weird.”
Neil shoots me a glare over his shoulder, pulling his glasses down on his nose to look over them. That move used to scare the shit out of me when I was young. Now, it’s an achievement to make him do it.
He shuffles his way forward eventually, giving up on picking a fight here in the garage, and Lily and I follow him inside.
“Your mother is in the kitchen making tea. You know you made her feel like shit yesterday.” Every word that leaves his mouth sounds like a grunt.
“That’s why I’m here.” I sigh.
“Good. That woman deserves a real apology.” He gestures toward the kitchen, as if I don’t know where it is, then continues down the hallway to the sound of his TV. He’s watching football, which means maybe I’ll get some time alone with Mom.
“You weren’t exaggerating,” Lily says in a hushed voice. I pull my mouth into a tight line and shake my head. If anything, I probably went light on the Neil details. The man is the actual devil.
“I was thinking of heating up that leftover stew for lunch. What—” She was expecting me to be Neil. My mom stops stirring her tea when her eyes spot me instead. “Oh.”
“Oh,” I repeat, shrugging with a lopsided smile.
Lily clears her throat at my side.
“Right, uhm . . . Mom, this is Lily,” I say, holding a hand out as if I’m presenting her like some prize on thePrice Is Right.
“Yes, Lily. I . . . well, we haven’t met, but I do know you. You knew Annie. And I know you were with her—” Mom’s words trail off and she glances down at her tea and begins to stir. She called my sister Annie most of her life. She’s the only one who could. Anika loved it. It reminded her that our mom was ours before she was with Neil.
“Nice to formally meet you,” Lily says, stepping forward and reaching out her hand. My mom puts her spoon down on the counter and leaves her cup to shake Lily’s hand.
Neither of them tries to fill in the blanks where my mom left off. It’s a learned behavior in our house, not speaking about what happened in full sentences. Lily’s one of the few who understands how those strange rules work.
“What brings you both here? I’m sorry; how rude. Would you like some tea?” My mom’s hand is trembling as she picks up her cup, so I take it from her and move toward the table.
“I’m fine. Lily, you want any?” I know she doesn’t, but it’s polite to ask.
She shakes her head and moves to take the chair on the other side of me.
My mom sits down and brings her cup to her lips with both hands, blowing on the steaming surface. She’s notorious for burning her tongue, unable to stop herself from sipping too early.
“Looks hot,” I warn as she proceeds to test it despite me. Her lips barely meet the liquid before she pulls the cup away and continues to blow.
“You’re right. It is.”
I chuckle lightly.
“You hush,” she whispers.
I twist in my chair to bring my feet under me and fold my hands together to rest them on the table as my mom continues to cool her tea, eventually taking a sip for real. It’s still too hot, but she will never admit that.
“I want to talk about Neil,” I begin.
Her brow furrows.
“Oh? And not about that embarrassing display you made of yourself at the game yesterday?” Those aren’t her words; they’re his. I recognize some of his favorite things to say—embarrassing display.