“It’s all right, Jeni.” She administers pain relief and gently pats me on the shoulder.
I move my arm over my eyes in despair. My body’s aching, not only from the fall and the cuts and bruises from the glass, but also my stomach from where the heavy box fell on top of me. I can’t stop moaning even though it’s embarrassing. I feel like my life has already changed so much since Aiden was released from jail. But this, right here, is going to change us even more.
We arrive at the hospital, and they take me through to the emergency room. My arm is still over my eyes in anguish as the EMT talks quietly with the triage nurse.
“Female. Mid to late twenties. Fell from a ladder onto a glass table. She’s complaining of abdominal cramping and lower back pain. Possible pregnancy. Family not yet notified.”
They take me in and transfer me to another bed, and as they try to move me, my stomach cramps again.
“Jesus! Fuck that hurts.” After the pain subsides, I shift my gaze to the nurse. “Can someone call my partner, please?” I just need Aiden.
She pulls out a small notepad and pen. “Of course. What’s his name and number?”
I give her the details, and she walks away to call him.
Sometime later she comes back in. “He’s on his way, sweetheart.”
Relief floods me. I need Aiden, I can’t do this without him. I’m weak and disorientated. I don’t know if it’s from the pain or the medication, but I feel vague and out of it. I can’t make any decisions without him here.
A doctor comes in pushing an ultrasound machine. “Jeni, I’m going to have a look at your abdomen. Is that okay?”
I nod, and he raises my shirt, squeezing out some cold gel onto my stomach. Normally the cold would make me flinch, but the feeling is nothing compared to the pain in the rest of my body. He moves the device around my abdomen and glances at the nurse with a nod.
She picks up a phone. “Yes. We have a female coming up who’s having a miscarriage. The fetal membranes have ruptured, and there’s continued bleeding, pain, and fever. There could be a tear in the uterus. She’s bleeding profusely. The mother is at risk of developing an infection. We need to operate immediately.”
My heart sinks on hearing the words I feared the most—a miscarriage.
I’m… no, was… pregnant.
I need Aiden, now!
A tear rolls down my cheek again as widespread numbness takes hold. My chest tightens with no hope of loosening its grip on my heart, to the point where I can’t breathe. My head pounds with a crushing headache as my throat constricts with overwhelming grief.
“Can you save the baby?” I call out to the doctor, who’s cleaning the gel off my stomach.
He looks at me, creasing his brows, and he shakes his head. “I’m sorry. There’s nothing we can do. We need to remove the fetal tissue from your uterus.”
I look at him in disgust. “It’s my baby, not fucking fetal tissue. Please. You have to do something,” I beg as another cramp hits me while I cry into my hands.
As I am wheeled away, I scream out, “I need, Aiden!” I’m panicking, I know I am. They need to at least try to save my baby. I thrash about on the gurney while a nurse holds me down.
“Calm down, Jeni. We’re going to sedate you now.”
I shake my head violently. “No. You have to save my baby.” She holds me down as someone puts a cannula into my hand.
“Please, please, at least try and save my baby,” I yell out, but no one’s listening as my heart races so fast.
I try to fight the pull, but I swiftly fade into unconsciousness.
My eyes flutter open. Aiden’s holding my hand, stroking it softly. His saddened face stares at the floor. He looks miserable.
“Aiden?” I ask quietly.
His eyes meet mine, and he manages a half-smile. “How are you feeling?” He kisses my hand tenderly.
My breath catches as the memory of it all hits me full force. “I’m… so… sorry.”
“Why are you sorry?” A confused and bewildered look crosses his face.