“Yeah. It freaks me the fuck out.”
“But you’re so good, Nix.”
“Here. I’m good here. But it’s college, B. What if I don’t fit in there? What if I’m not good enough?”
What if I was the boy with the sad life story? The outcast? The charity case?
She leaned up, touching her head to mine and inhaled a shaky breath. “Isn’t it better to have tried than to always wonder what if?”
A small chuckle left my lips. “You make it sound so easy.”
“You’re good enough, Nix.” Her eyes drilled into mine, the flecks of dark green hypnotic. “And you’re worthy. You deserve this. You deserve a shot at something good, something better.”
“You do too, you know? You deserve the world.” And I wanted to give it to her.
“I can’t see that far yet.” She dropped her gaze, leaving a cold chill in my veins.
“Birdie, look at me.” I angled her face to mine. “If you can’t see it yet, I’ll see it for the both of us.”
“You promise?”
“I promise. Can I… kiss you?”
Harleigh nodded and my heart stuttered in my chest. Leaning in, I brushed my lips over hers, tracing them with my tongue. “Open up for me, B. Let me in,” I murmured, sliding my fingers into her hair, anchoring us together.
We kissed and kissed and kissed. We kissed until my lungs ached and my dick strained painfully behind my sweats. But I didn’t push her for more and Harleigh seemed content to get lost in the way our tongues tangled: slow indolent licks chased by teeth and lips and breathless moans.
“Nix,” she whispered, pressing her body closer. Tears rolled down her cheeks, dripping between us.
“Don’t cry, B.” Please don’t cry. My heart splintered as I dried her eyes and kissed her some more.
“I don’t want to be like this… I don’t want—”
I kissed her harder, drowning out the words, the roar of blood between my ears.
She was perfect.
Harleigh Wren.
My Birdie.
Mine.
Mine.
Mine.
I just needed her to believe it, to understand that this—us—was real. It was worth fighting for.
She was worth it.
“I love you, B.” I breathed the words onto her lips. Murmuring them over and over until there was no way on earth she couldn’t believe them.
Harleigh broke the kiss and stared at me. Eyes glossy and weary. “I love you too,” she whispered.
Her words sank into me, filling the cracks, smoothing the sharp and jagged edges inside me. Her love had always been my salvation.
But as she kissed me again, I couldn’t ignore the ball of dread deep inside me.