Hayes froze. “You’re what?”
“I’m moving out. It’s time.”
He was quiet. I marked the moments in heartbeats—the one-two pulse ringing in my ears. Hayes scrubbed a hand over hisstubbled jaw. “There a reason I’m just now hearing about this and only because I caught you in the act?”
Because he would’ve tried to talk me out of it just like most everyone else in my life would. “I just decided.”
Hayes stared at me a beat. “Big step. Have you talked to your therapist about it?”
My fingers curled, my nails digging into my palms. “I don’t need to talk to a shrink to know my own mind.”
“I’m not saying you do. I just thought it might be good to have someone to talk to and work through the feelings that come up around the process.”
“I’m an adult, Hayes.”
He blew out a breath. “I’m not suggesting you aren’t. I just…I worry. But I’m so damn proud of you, too.”
A little of my annoyance fled at his honesty. I ached to wrap my arms around him, to hug my brother and reassure him. But I couldn’t make my arms cooperate. “I’m okay. But I won’t be if I don’t get out on my own. I can’t live like this forever.”
Little lines creased Hayes’ brow. “I know it’s been hard. I just want you happy and safe. Where are you moving? I’ll do a walk-through and check the security. We’ll get new locks installed, an alarm system if there isn’t one already in place.”
My stomach dipped as if I’d just taken the plunge on a hellish rollercoaster. “You don’t need to do that.”
“Of course, I do. It’ll make Mom and Dad feel better, too. Where is the place? Apartment in town? Or a house?”
I fought the urge to squirm as Hayes waited.
“Shy?” he prodded.
“I’m renting Ramsey Bishop’s guest cabin.” We hadn’t actually discussed the cost of said rent. I hadn’t even asked if I could bring Sky, but I had to assume that he figured I would, and his barn was massive. I was sure he’d have a stall open for her.My brain was spiraling now, anything to distract me from my brother’s rapidly reddening face.
“Are you out of your mind?”
He bellowed the words so loudly I felt the vibrations against my skin.
The front door to the ranch house flew open, and my parents appeared. They hurried across the drive towards us. My dad’s brows pulled together. “What’s all the yelling about?”
Hayes’ chest rose and fell in labored breaths. “Shy—she—she thinks she’s moving out. Into Ramsey Bishop’s guest cabin.”
Everyone stilled. My dad’s eyes widened a fraction, and my mom’s jaw dropped open.
“Moving?” My mom gaped.
“Yes. It’s time.”
She shook her head in tiny, rapid movements. “This is about Howard Kemper. I knew this would bring up things that were difficult to deal with but running away isn’t going to help.”
“It’s not about that. This is about me. I need some room to breathe.”
Dad ran a hand over his head. “And we want you to have that, but I think what your mom is saying is that now doesn’t seem like the best time. If you need more privacy, we can build you a cabin on our property—”
“No.” It was all I could say. One word that showed there was no room for negotiation or capitulation. I had to stand strong. “I need to do this. And I think it might be good to take a little time off from working here.”
The truth was, with as little overhead as I had, I’d saved up years of living expenses, even though my dad rarely utilized my help around the ranch. It was a pity job. And it was time for me to stop taking from them.
“That’s ridiculous, Shiloh,” my mom clipped.
“He spent years in prison,” Hayes gritted out.