“You gave her a ring?” Those were the first words she threw at me. I really didn’t have time for this shit, but I couldn’t see me treating her like one of the sheep, not after the relationship I’d had with her old man.
On the other hand, my woman had just walked away from me looking like I’d gutted her or some fuck and that shit was not cool.
“Everybody get back to what you were doing. Max I’m gonna need you, Cam and Rog in the next five we got shit to do.” I waited until they left and the only ones there were she, her sister and I. “You can leave too.”
Pam looked like she wanted to argue but the way I felt right then if she gave me any shit I would’ve thrown her ass off my place never to return again.
She must’ve seen the look on my face because she had the sense to walk the fuck away. “You wanna tell me what the fuck you’re doing here now, why you’d bring this shit to my door? The only reason I’m not planting a foot in your ass for fucking with her is because of him and the friendship we had, but that was your last get out of jail free card.”
“How can you say that? You promised him remember, you said you’d take care of me after he was gone.” She was breathing hard and close to tears with fire shooting out of her eyes. After two years of no contact I’m thinking this shit was not normal.
“And you took that to mean what? That I was going to make you my woman, what the fuck ever gave you that idea?” The whole fucking mess was pissing me the fuck off.
“But that night, in bed, we were so good together.” She looked genuinely hurt and I felt like shit. How had I misread that whole situation so badly? “I thought we were offering each other comfort, that’s all it meant to me I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to mislead you.” Hadn’t I said this shit before? Why would she think things had changed now?
“It’s not fair, Ian was a good man, he was all I had and then you…” She started to shake and it was then that I got a good look at her. She had wasted away to almost nothing in the time she’d been gone. That shit hurt me to my core, that I might’ve had a hand in doing that to her, fuck.
“What the fuck did you do to yourself? Come here.” I didn’t think anything of it when I wrapped my arms around her to offer comfort. Before we’d confused shit by jumping into bed together, we’d been pals. A hug between us was as easy as passing a beer.
I’d spent many a night on her couch laughing and unwinding with her and her old man back in the day when shit was just getting started. I guess you can say we’d grown together in this new life, each learning our way as best we could and shoring each other up.
“I’m sorry I hurt you, that was never my intent, but you have to let it go and move on. It’s not me that you want it’s him. You think you can recapture that by being with me but you can’t. And Deidre, I love her, even when I was with you I knew it was going to be her, I’ve known for a long time now, I’m sorry.”
She cried into my chest, heartbreaking body wracking sobs that tore at me and made me relive the loss of my pal all over again. I turned to take her inside and my eyes met Jessie’s and fuck me if she didn’t look like I’d betrayed her.
“Wait here Deidre.” I whistled for Max to come to me and passed her off when he did. “Take her to her sister. Deidre I have to go I’m sorry.”
I had nothing more to give her right then, I had more pressing matters on my hands. Like the young girl I’d just had chained to my bed for the last few days, who was now looking at me like I was the worse kind of scum for betraying her. Fuck me sideways with a claw hammer.
I didn’t spare my old friend a second glance as I turned and went to face the woman that looked like she was going to kick my ass or crawl into a hole and die. “Baby…” She evaded my hand when I reached for her and walked away from me. “Uh-uh babygirl, we don’t do that come here to me.” I stood my ground and waited for her to obey me.
She folded her arms and kept her back turned. I needed this shit today. “Look at me.” Still nothing, when the hell did she get to be this damn stubborn?