“Thank you,” I reply and watch as Sarah rolls her eyes.
We stay here in silence, as Frankie just stands behind Sarah. I’m dying to tell Sarah about the pregnancy but I know that I can’t, not yet. I haven’t told her everything about what happened with Martin. She’s going to be so hurt that I’ve not confided in her about any of this.
“Frankie, go away, we’re talking,” Sarah tells him as she pushes him away.
He smirks, “See you later Mia.”
I wave at him. “Bye.”
Sarah laughs, “God, he’s so weird. He’s got a crush on you.”
I give her a get real look, “Yeah, right.”
She continues to laugh. “I swear to you, Mia, he’s got the biggest crush on you, it’s why he was pissed at Lacey’s funeral when he found out you and Hudson were engaged.”
“Where’s Jagger?” I ask changing the subject.
“He’s working.” The fear in her voice is clear to hear.
“He’ll be okay.” Even as I say the words, I don’t believe them. Martin doesn’t give a shit who he hurts and he certainly wouldn’t hesitate in hurting Jagger.
“I’m hoping so, Mia. We’ve finally got somewhere where we’re both happy.”
I smile, this time it’s a genuine one. “You love him and he loves you.”
“I know, he’s promised me that he’ll never hurt me again.” She sighs and I know there’s something she’s not saying. I wait, letting the silence fill us. “I’m worried that he’ll go back to Carina.”
“Never,” I say vehemently. “That was over before he found out about Allie. Trust me Sarah, Carina is someone you don’t have to worry about. Jagger loves you.”
She rubs her hands over her arms, “That’s what he said too.”
“I wouldn’t lie to you, Sarah, if I thought there was even the slightest chance about it, I’d tell you,” I promise her.
Relief shines through in her eyes. “Yeah, you’re right.” She shakes her head, “God, when did this get about me? I’m sorry.”
“Don’t apologize, I was glad of the reprieve.”
Allie cries in the background. “I’m sorry Mia, I’m going to have to go, that’s her just waking up. She’ll be hungry.”
“Don’t apologize, I’ll talk to you later. Bye, Sarah.”
She blows me a kiss. “Bye, Mia.” She ends the call.
I sit here, and search through my pictures. I realize as I flick through them that there aren’t that many of Hudson and I. I have loads of Lacey and I, even of mom and I. I smile when I see the picture of Lacey and I, we were in the car on our way to Hidden Hills, we’d just pulled over to get something to eat. We’re both making weird faces. God, I miss her so much. She didn’t deserve to die, she was the sweetest girl ever, she never upset anyone. For Martin to be the one to kill her hurts, she really liked him and he ended her life.
The tears fall down my face and I let them. I come across a picture of mom, Lacey and I, it was the night that Hudson and I reunited, Mom and Harrison’s marriage celebration. After Lacey and I were dressed, Mom came into the room and we took a picture of the three of us. Looking at this picture, I see the woman that was so in love, so beyond happy that her smile was infectious. I carry on scrolling, loving just how many pictures I have of the two women that had the greatest impact on my life. I come across a picture of Mom and Harrison, I don’t remember taking it, mom is in Harrison’s arms, her head tilted back to look at him, they both have matching smiles, and the look of love they have reminds me of the look that Hudson has when he looks at me.
The bed dips and I glance to my left to see Hudson sitting beside me. I lean my head against his shoulder. “Everything okay?”
He kisses my head. “Yeah, Princess, just Dad checking in to see how you are.”
I lift my phone and show him the screen.
“When you see that, you can’t deny that they really loved each other.”
“No, you can’t. I can’t think about losing you, just the thought makes my heart hurt. I can’t imagine what your father’s going through right now.”
“I lost you, fuck, I fell apart on the inside. I’m not going to lie, Princess, I am nothing without you, that’s for fucking sure. I couldn’t sleep, I couldn’t fucking eat. I was in limbo, I had no idea if you were alive, or if he had killed you. The thought of you dying,” he shakes his head, his Adam’s apple bobbing up and down as he swallows hard. “So, Princess, I get a fifth of what my dad’s feeling, right now he’s dealing with it. There’s going to come a time when he’s going to let the darkness take over.”