He blinked, his face tense, and then let out a long shuddering breath, shaking his head.
“Not really, but it’s bad, I know that much. I’m just a mechanic, for fuck’s sake. I fix up the community’s cars, hang out with my mates, drink a few beers on the weekend, and relax. That’s it.”
I let him go because I could see he was settling somewhat. He used his freedom to pace back and forth.
“When I saw you, I thought maybe I had a chance of seeing you through your heat, or getting sucked off by Axel if that wasn’t on the table. It was all supposed to be good, clean fun. The first time you touched me, my fucking head spun. It felt good, amazing, but that wasn’t all of it. It felt familiar, not because I saw Shauny getting you off in front of the window, but because we’d done this before.”
He surged forward, standing over me now, so tall and muscular, I started to question my previous pushiness, but he stopped just short of me. He didn’t want to. I saw it, as he searched my face, as he looked for something, but what?
“Over and over, you and me.” He moved closer and held out a hand, making it clear he wanted to touch my face, so I stepped into it, his eyes and mine closing. For a moment, in a strange world, in a space multiple millennia old, everything now and everything then blended together. When I opened my eyes, I saw him overlaid with Ethan’s much blunter, more honest features.
“Fearn?”
Branwen’s counterpart, the conduit for the Great Black Wolf before Lonan took his place, the one who was supposed to step down, but there was more, so much more. I could feel it abstractly, something that simmered under the surface, Ethan’s eyes blazing green as he stared down at me.
“It doesn’t have to be about them,” he said, almost to himself. “We can move beyond that shit, build something new.”
I thought of Flora’s words, of her admonition that we should try not to make the same mistakes again.
“Tell me you want that, Bec.” His voice was a low rasp now, desperate and needy, and it took everything I had to not just give in. I covered his hand with mine, moving to place a kiss on his palm, and reached up to bring his lips down on mine.
“Yes…” he hissed. “Yes.”
But he wasn’t going to just give me his kiss and his body. He wanted to tell himself that it could be that simple, but I thought we both knew that wasn’t the case. When we touched, when we kissed, when I felt his tongue snaking out and his hands wrapping around my waist, dragging me closer, I felt and tasted Ethan. But we were more than just us, players that were forced on stage over and over, given another go to try and get it right.
Oh yes… Branwen hissed. Your Fearn is a much lustier soul than mine ever was. Well, for me. He managed to find a passion for others though.
And like some subterranean beast, she rose up and swallowed us both, dragging us down, down, into the shitty machinations of her past.
I heard the muffled sounds of Fearn’s cries the minute my hands went to the door. Lonan had promised to leave the door open a crack, and it appeared he was true to his word. That went someway to alleviating my concerns. The conduit to be was an outlander, dark, beautiful, too good for the likes of Hara and her little whelp, Jaya, but he was not schooled in the way of things in Oemis. Like fucking the Black Wolf’s conduit, that was strictly verboten. The two of them could invite others to their bed on feast days, but this?
It’d all been planned out, Lonan and I plotting late into the night, wrapped around each other like vines, before he got hard again and had to reach for me. Even as Lonan had driven his cock deep into me, he’d whispered the steps we’d take to secure our rule beyond time, beyond death. He’d fucked me until I couldn’t tell where I ended and he began, which seemed somehow appropriate at the time.
It was somewhat distressing to see Fearn experiencing the same degrees of ecstasy.
When I walked in, quiet as a mouse, the high arched sandals I was normally forced to wear discarded at the door, I caught them just as I’d been told I would, but strangely, my surprise was not feigned. Fearn was an apathetic lover, only really able to rouse himself on feast days, the eyes of the crowd doing more for him than my beauty ever did. He was largely immune to it, I realised. Right now, he was bent over on his hands and knees, taking Lonan’s cock in punishing strokes I knew intimately. My cervix ached a little in sympathy, having endured a delightful battery of its own this morning, but the sight of Fearn… His mouth was open, his pants and groans guttural, his dick completely and utterly rigid as Lonan rode him. So swollen was his cock that cum dripped constantly from the purple head, all over the bed. I had never been able to wring a response even halfway as intense from my mate.
“Fearn?”
My insecurity coloured my voice, making me sound all the more credible, my tone wavering. I was a beautiful woman and was always welcomed with open arms whenever I walked amongst the people. Men and women fell over themselves to serve me, to pleasure me, all except Fearn.
“Oh!” he gasped, his mouth forming a perfect O, but he didn’t pull away nor scramble to cover himself, instead pushing back harder and faster on Lonan’s cock, seeking to wring every last drop of pleasure he could.
“This is what you were doing when you were too tired to attend to me,” I said. This was scripted, but real anger bled into my voice. Fearn’s abandonment to pleasure was a slap to my face, my lover’s cock giving him ten times more than I could. “This is why you have pushed me away, time after time.”
Lonan grinned over Fearn’s shoulder at me, slowing his strokes now to the sound of the other man’s whimpers.
“This is why you shrink from my touch, why you push me away?” I put my foot up on the bed, the slit
in my voluminous dress revealing everything Fearn had rejected. “Lonan is Jaya’s mate, to replace you as conduit to the Black Wolf.”
“Yes…” Fearn agreed, though I wasn’t sure to what.
“You have defiled your vows, chosen me over your lady, the conduit of the goddess,” Lonan said, making me frown. This wasn’t part of the script. “You must make amends, as you would to the goddess herself.”
I wasn’t sure what devilry he was indulging in, but he thrust himself hard into Fearn, forcing the other man’s face into me, and much to my surprise, my lacklustre mate attacked my skin with a fervour he’d never shown before. He devoured me as best he could, wrapping his arms around my hips, forcing me to move in time with their strokes. Lonan just grinned, something that should’ve been fair warning of what was to come, but right now, that was all I was focussed on. Fearn’s muffled groans against my clit, his tongue lashing me inexpertly but with an enthusiasm that made up for lack of technique. It was Lonan, his eyes flashing red as he leant over the other man, the grin falling away until there was just him, my love, my true mate. He offered his mouth to me, and I took it, the two of us just using Fearn as an outlet for the unearthly lust that came whenever we touched.
After we’d come, after we destroyed each other with pleasure, we both pulled free of Fearn, leaving him panting on the bed, still twitching, cum coating his stomach. It was me that Lonan wrapped his arms around, not Fearn. We stared down at him, and then I said, “If you want this to continue, if you want to experience these pleasures again, you’ll need to do exactly as we say.”